


Precious Possession

by MissBinx



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Age Play, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Child Abandonment, Consensual Infidelity, DDLG, Daddy Kink, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Forced Marriage, Grief/Mourning, HEA, Happily Ever After, Infidelity, Kylo is a foodie, Lots of food talk bc the author is also a foodie, Loveless Marriage, Mutual Pining, Non-Sexual Age Play, Praise Kink, Pregnancy, Size Kink, Spanking, Sweet and Nasty, Unplanned Pregnancy, death of a child
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-22
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:13:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 37,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25438249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissBinx/pseuds/MissBinx
Summary: Growing up in the foster system, Rey never learned what it meant to be taken care of. As a touch starved adult, Rey stumbles across the world of age play and meets the mysterious Kylo Ren, who seems to have secrets of his own. As their weekly arrangement brings them closer together, lines begin to blur. Can they keep their arrangement chaste or will they give in to their desires?A daddy kink fic with a dark twist.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 193
Kudos: 405





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome again to another new story! Please read the tags to make sure you're up for this story before starting!  
> This will probably be my darkest, most angsty fic so be prepared (although I do promise plenty of fluff and a HEA!) Thanks!

Rey had thought moving to New York would be a fresh start -- a chance to forget about her past, and become someone different in a new city, in a new country. But packing up everything and moving a few thousand miles away would never be enough to solve all of her problems. She’d been so naive to think that creating a new life would magically fix the hole in her heart and as much as she tried to hide it, in the end she could only wear it on her sleeve.

The first time it truly hit her how fucked up she was during the first week of her freshman year when her new friend Finn had reached for her hand and she found herself pulling away, disgusted and uncomfortable by his overly familiar touch. He didn’t comment at the time, but Rey knew she’d never forget the hurt look on his face or forgive herself for putting it there. What kind of friend did that?

As guilty as she felt, that hadn’t been the only time she’d flinched away. There was the time that Rose had tried to hug her and Rey had panicked and locked herself in the bathroom. Or the time at a frat party when she’d almost punched a guy for casually putting his arm around her. If the look of pain on Finn’s face wasn’t enough, she’d had to deal with Rose’s pity and the humiliation of a dozen shocked party goers.

She wished she could be like everyone else. She wished that human contact didn't make her skin crawl, that she could accept a hug from the friends she loved, that she could turn off that pure rush of adrenaline that kicked in, telling her to run whenever someone got too close. But she couldn’t. 

Rey was broken.

Sometimes she cried about it when she was alone in her dorm room, or in the communal shower where no one could hear her. She hid her pain with smiles and attempts at normal college life, all while knowing she’d never really have a normal life. How could she have real friends if she couldn’t hug them? How could she fall in love if she couldn’t stand anyone touching her? The smiles couldn’t hide the fear that her friends would get sick of 

her or that no man would have patience if she didn’t put out.

“The Intervention” happened in the fall of Rey’s sophomore year, right after a particularly brutal round of midterms. The second they were over on Friday afternoon, Rose and Finn had showed up with all of Rey’s favorite snacks and sat her down on the futon in her dorm room.

“Why are you guys so serious?” Rey asked, reaching for the party sized bag of M&Ms. “Wanna watch another episode of Chopped?”

“Can we talk?” Rose’s voice was soft and she looked to Finn for support.

“About what?” Rey could feel herself stiffen with apprehension.

The look Rose gave Rey was full of so much pity that it made Rey’s insides twist. “Remember how Finn found you crying in the library last week?”

“Oh, yeah,” Rey grimaced and at least had the decency to look embarrassed.

“And how you wouldn’t let him hug you?”

Rey’s eyes closed and she whispered, “Yes.” She’d been so lucky to make it this long without having this conversation. She balled her hands into fists, trying not to show how upset she was because if she was honest with herself, she’d been expecting them to eventually say they didn’t want to be her friend anymore. As she stared at the bag of M&Ms, she couldn’t help but think how nice it was that they’d at least brought her something she loved to soften the blow and how undeserving she was of that kindness.

“Why?”

She shrugged, “Dunno.” She refused to look at them because she knew she’d cry and she didn’t want them to feel guilty for not wanting to be her friend anymore.

“Really?” Rose asked. “I think you do.” 

For her second year as a psych student, Rose was unnaturally talented at seeing to the root of a problem but Rey was a weed and she refused to just let Rose pull her out and expose those roots for everyone to see, so she shrugged again. Of course, Rey knew why. Rose knew. Finn knew. They all knew why Rey was like this.

She was a prime example of what happened when a person was a child and grew up in a system where no one wanted her or cared enough. She’d blocked out every memory of her parents and she could only recall growing up in foster homes with guardians who never brushed her hair or put bandaids on her knee when she scraped them or hugged her goodnight.

And while Finn and Rose didn’t know that many details, they could obviously guess what kind of life she had based on how she couldn’t accept human contact in any shape or form.

“I’m sorry,” was all Rey could get out before her voice began to quiver.

“No, Rey,” Rose said, her hand coming up to touch Rey’s shoulder before she second-guessed herself and let it fall into her lap. “We want to help you, we just don’t know how.”

“I don’t know either,” Rey admitted quietly as she opened her fist to look at the crushed M&M in her palm.

“I think,” Rose began carefully, “that you just aren’t used to being touched, right?”

Rey nodded. It went beyond being ‘not used to’ it. She’d never had a chance to get used to it. She’d wished so hard for someone to just care that she was _alive_ that she didn’t even consider getting a hug as a possibility. 

“Maybe it’s something we can work on?” Rose suggested, patting her shoulder awkwardly.

The subject was dropped after that and Finn cheerfully reached for the remote to turn on another episode of their favorite cooking show, but Rey couldn’t stop thinking about their conversation. There were a flurry of emotions inside of her head that kept her from focusing on anything on the tv screen. She felt humiliated that her friends had called her out and ashamed that they felt the need to help her or stick by her despite her obvious shortcomings. Under that, there was anger; she was angry that she had been abandoned, that she didn’t like being touched, and way deep down that Rose and Finn had told her to work on it and then just set the subject aside as if they’d been talking about the weather.

In a way, things were easier for her once Finn and Rose brought her problem to the table as a topic -- they didn’t acknowledge it again, but there was at least sympathy when Rey pulled away. She couldn’t blame them for not talking about it and she had to tell herself that it wasn’t that they didn’t _care --_ if that was true, they would have given up on her freshman year. They cared, it just wasn’t a problem that really affected them. The burden of ‘working on it’ was Rey’s and Rey’s alone.

The next couple of years passed without a hitch, and Rey tried her hardest to focus on school and not her crippling touch starvation. She made it all the way to the summer of her senior year without a boyfriend, without holding hands or having her own kiss. Finn and Rose had gotten together by then, and Rey had grown used to the sight of them doing all the things happy couples did, but that didn’t mean it didn’t feel like a stab to the heart every single time.

The summer before her senior year was _special_ because Rey had gotten an internship with Skywalker Aviation, the oldest and most prestigious aviation electronics company and she was angling for a position in the company upon graduation. And if not a position, then at least a damn good letter of recommendation for grad school.

Most of her first week consisted of fetching coffee or making photo copies, but Rey wasn’t foolish -- she knew that was what an intern did. Every once in a while, she caught sight of Leia Organa in her tailored suits heading to an important meeting, or her brother Luke, who not only engineered the Skywalker 4310, but flew it in the Gulf War… and most exciting of all was _the_ Han Solo who single handedly refurbished a 1933 Skywalker Liberator, flew it around the world in record time and won the heart of Leia Organa herself.

She remembered the first time she’d read the story of Han Solo in a magazine she found at her old foster home. Not only had she thought Mr. Solo was one of the most handsome men she’d ever seen, but she thought the story was so exciting and romantic. She’d hung the magazine article on her crumbly little wall, carried it with her every time she moved, and decided then and there that she would work for Skywalker Aviation. From that day on, Rey got her hands on everything Avionics related -- books, magazines, even little pieces of airplane equipment she could scavenge from antique shops and junk yards.

Seeing her childhood idols in person was the most exciting part of the job and made it worth it that she was a glorified errand girl. It wasn’t _all_ bad. Sure, Monday through Friday she fetched coffee and called everyone ma’am or sir, but when Friday night rolled around and everyone went out for drinks… that’s when Rey knew it was her opportunity to rub elbows.

Her boss, Poe Dameron, was especially friendly after a few drinks. “Rumor has it that Han might show up,” he’d teased her that Friday morning and Rey wondered how it was so obvious to everyone that she had a crush on him.

“Really?” Rey tried to keep the excitement from her voice, but couldn’t manage.

“Yep,” Poe grinned and took his coffee from Rey’s grasp. “You better come tonight, Johnson!”

That was the only reason why she was standing in the cramped bathroom of a downtown bar, letting Kaydel Connix, Poe’s secretary, put lipstick on her. “I can’t believe you have a crush on Han Solo. He’s so old!”

“s mot a _crsh_. Ee’s more like a childhood hero,” Rey argued, her speech warbled as she tried to keep her lips still for the other girl.

“Suuuuure,” Kaydel teased and gave Rey a wink. “It’s okay. I like older men too. God, I can’t get enough of Dameron.”

Rey scrunched her nose as Kaydel recapped her lipstick. “Poe? Really?”

“He’s got a huge…” Kaydel began and was interrupted as Leia Organa herself walked into the bathroom.

“Oh, Kaydel, how are you?”

“Good! Good!” Kaydel smiled and turned Rey by the shoulders. “Have you met Poe’s intern?”

“Oh! You’re Ms. Johnson?” Leia smiled and crossed the room, shaking Rey’s hand. “Oh, I do hope that’s water on your hands?”

Rey’s face turned bright, “Yes! I just washed them. Sorry…”

Leia laughed, “Don’t worry about it. I saw your internship application and we were all very impressed. Is it true that you’ll be rebuilding a Skywalker Albatross engine?”

Rey nodded, “Yes ma’am!”

“Where did you find it?” Leia asked. “I’ve been meaning to pull you into my office for a few weeks now to chat, I’ve just been so busy.”

“Um,” Rey felt so frazzled talking to her boss about her senior project. “I met a lot of aviation people back in England and one of them had an old Albatross. There was almost nothing left but the engine was in good shape. I have a friend who is in the welding program and he’s going to help me remake a body for it. I’m hoping she’ll be airworthy by the end of the year.”

Leia was already pulling Rey out of the bathroom, “You’ve got to meet my husband…”

By the time Rey was finished gushing rotary engines with Han Solo, she had finished two beers and was pulling herself out of the booth where Poe was accusing Leia of stealing _his_ intern. “I’ll get another round,” she offered, though no one was really listening. 

She marched over to the bar and leaned against it, waiting for the bartender to finish serving someone else. 

“Hey, it’s Rey, right?” a jovial voice asked, and when she turned, she recognized a familiar face but didn’t have a name. “I’m Snap Wexley. I work in the electronics division,” he explained.

“Oh, right. Nice to meet you,” she offered her hand and Wex took it, pulling her closer to him with it.

“I’ve really enjoyed watching you at work,” he smirked. “Do you want to come sit with me and the guys?” he nodded over to the booth where he was sitting with a group of what Kaydel called The Office Bros.

“Uh, no thanks,” Rey tried pulling her hand away. On what planet would she rather sit there when she had a spot at a table with Leia and Han?

Wexley didn’t seem to take the hint and pulled her closer, “Come on. Just one drink.”

“She said no,” Kaydel said, pulling Rey away. “She’s sitting with the boss tonight. Why would she sit with your lame ass?”

“Bite me, Connix,” Snap smirked, wrapping an arm around Rey’s waist. “She’s just playing a little hard to get.”

“She’s not,” Kaydel barked back, trying to pull Rey away.

“I’m really not,” Rey reiterated, stepping closer to Kaydel.

“Alright, bud,” a new voice entered the conversation and when Rey turned her head, she was glad to see Poe. “I think you’ve had enough tonight. You should go home before you embarrass yourself in front of Leia.”

Poe patted Snap’s shoulder and nudged him back to his own table, but not before giving Rey one last glare. “You shouldn’t act so frigid. You’re in a man’s world here and the sooner you learn it, the better.”

Rey scoffed as he stomped his way back to the table. Once he was gone, Kaydel turned towards Poe and cooed, “Thank you, daddy.” She batted her eyelashes at him girlishly and Rey watched the exchange with fascination.

Poe affectionately stroked Kaydel’s cheek and told her in a mock tone, “You be a good girl and stay out of trouble now, ok?”

“Yes, daddy,” Kaydel nodded and received a pat on the head before Poe walked away.

Once he was gone, Rey stood, blinking stupidly and trying to work out what she’d just seen. Poe had been so sweet and gentle with Kaydel. “Did you just… call him daddy?”

Kaydel laughed, “Um, yeah…”

“ _WHY?”_ Rey asked, still trying to work it all out in her head. She’d known that they were having sex, but Rey had never heard of calling a lover _daddy._ Was it weird? Gross? Was it weird and gross that Rey didn’t find it that weird or gross?

“Um,” Kaydel had the decency to look a little embarrassed. “It’s a kink, I guess?”

“Huh,” was all Rey said. This was how little she knew about sex. She never even considered the idea of what she’d just witnessed.

“I mean, it’s like a care thing, right? So Poe is older and he takes good care of me and I guess it’s just kind of hot?” Kaydel babbled. “Is it weird? Oh, God… don’t tell anyone.”

Rey waved her off and assured her it was fine before grabbing another round of beers and heading back to Leia’s table. Even after Leia apologized on behalf of Snap and Han started in on more flying stories, Rey’s mind kept drifting back to Kaydel and Poe’s exchange.

When she got back to her apartment that night, the first thing she did was pull out her computer and look up ‘daddy kink’.

The deeper she dove, the more she understood, and after twenty minutes of research, she found herself signing up for a forum for something called ‘age play’. She’d never ever tell Finn or Rose or hell, even Kaydel… but there was something in what she’d witnessed tonight that struck her on a deep level.

Rey hadn’t thought about it since she was a kid, maybe since she’d found that magazine of Han and wished she had a dad. That was what had wormed its way inside of her head, had made her jealous of Kaydel tonight. She wanted someone to take care of her, to pat her head and step in when she needed help.

Rey didn’t know about the sexual aspect of it all, but she was sure that wasn’t why it appealed to her. When, after nursing her headache on Saturday and doing her chores on Sunday, she finally decided to sit down and type up a message on the ageplay forum, she had already decided the kinky side of this was maybe too much for her.

She thought for a while about what she wanted to type before just deciding to come out with it. After taking a deep breath, she typed out:

_Hi, everyone. I am new to the whole age play thing. I was just wondering if there was anyone here who is interested in non-sexual age play? I am very interested in having a daddy (or open to a mommy) to take care of me. This may be an unusual request and if it’s not allowed, the mods can delete. Thanks!_

She hit the post button quickly, before she could change her mind.

*****

Kylo Ren was in trouble. Big Trouble. 

For the past year, work had been living hell and he was doing his damndest to hold on. He’d spent the past ten years slaving away for his boss and now he was on the cusp of being fired from Snoke Holdings. And for what?

As he entered his penthouse apartment, he slammed the door and stomped to the kitchen. When he found the empty bottle of wine on the counter, he picked it up and slammed it on the floor, letting the shards of glass scatter across the kitchen and into the living room. He paid no mind as he stalked towards the couch, the glass crunching under his feet, and dropped down onto it.

He ran a hand through his hair and let out a long breath through his nose. He’d given _everything_ to the company and it was all being yanked out from under him by Armitage fucking Hux. He was being usurped at every corner.

Hux’s numbers were better, his client list was longer, his presentations were better. Kylo’s performance was slipping and he knew it. And it was all _her_ fault. 

He’d married Caroline Snoke because it was what Snoke had wanted, because Kylo knew it would put him next in line for the CEO spot. And Kylo had gloated, oh how he’d gloated to Hux like he’d won. Kylo scoffed -- he hadn’t won a damn thing except more pain than he knew what to do with.

The lights were off in the apartment, but Kylo knew she was home, probably in bed. And he also knew that the only thing that could possibly save his career was a baby. If he had an heir, one of Snoke blood, he knew that he would be in Snoke’s favor again.

The issue was Caroline. The thought of sleeping with her, of creating a _human_ _life_ with that pathetic excuse of a woman made his stomach churn. Hell, he’d taken to sleeping in the guest bedroom to avoid her touch, which not only made his dick go soft, but quite possibly made it shrink up inside of his poor body.

It hadn’t always been like that. Once upon a time, he’d told himself that he could grow to love Caroline Snoke. She was beautiful and charming, after all. She’d had plenty of suitors in her day and as Snoke was always quick to point out, he was lucky that Caroline had chosen him to marry.

But that was before the alcohol. All of the damn alcohol. If Kylo were to open the door to her bedroom, he knew it would reek of the stuff. He’d tried throwing it away, he’d tried getting her help, but nothing worked.

Even if he could bring himself to sleep with her, how could she possibly carry a child when she was always on the bottle?

He held back a sob that was threatening to make its way out. Crying wouldn’t do any good. It wouldn’t put him back in Snoke’s good graces. It wouldn’t rewind his life back before he’d met Caroline, before he’d left home and sworn off his family legacy. He was powerless to change any of it and no amount of crying would alter his past.

He stood up and made his way to the guest room, taking off his tie and suit jacket on the way. Once he was in the bedroom, he booted up his computer and undressed. One hot shower later, he was sitting on his bed in a pair of sweatpants, staring at the message on his screen.

He didn’t know what led him to this website, he’d had it bookmarked for so long that he couldn’t even recall where he’d gotten the idea in his head.

It made sense -- he’d lost his ability to care for another human being. It had been weeks since he’d actually laid eyes on Caroline. Maybe if he could figure out how to take care of her, to take care of another human being, to correct the mistakes of his past… maybe then he could be in a place where they could try for a baby. Maybe.

When he stumbled upon FlyGirl99’s message, his heart gave a leap. Rather than replying to her message on the board, he sent her a private message:

_Hi, Flygirl99. My name is Kylo. I’m a 31 year old male living in NYC. I saw your message and I’m very interested in the idea of non-sexual ageplay. I know that you must be concerned about my sincerity, but I assure you I have no interest in pushing your boundaries. Let me know if you’re still interested. -Kylo_

*****

When Rey woke up Monday morning, she was expecting the mods to have deleted her post from the forum. She wasn’t expecting several replies assuring her that non-sexual age play was totally a thing and to not worry about her post.

She also was not expecting a private message. She skimmed through it and thought hard about what she wanted to say. Part of her was nervous, because what if he did turn out to be some kind of predator. His message seemed sincere, anyway. And if he really wanted sex, she’d skimmed through enough pages on the forum to know that there were plenty of ‘littles’ looking for sexual relationships. 

The least she could do was make it clear what she wanted so she decided to reply before getting ready for work:

_Hi Kylo. Thank you for your message. I appreciate your honesty. I thought maybe I’d tell you a little about myself first. My name is Rey and I’m 21. The reason why I am interested in age play is a little complicated but the short story is that I grew up in the foster system and never had a parent that took care of me. I want to be honest with you about what I’m looking for: I just want someone that will take care of me like a parent would a child. Someone to pat my head and hold my hand and maybe even read me bedtime stories. I am not looking for sex. If that’s weird for you, I understand. But if it sounds at all like something you’d be interested in, let me know._

Rey closed her computer and got dressed for work. She made it through the day, with a surprise apology from Snap Wexley and by the time she arrived at home, Kylo had already replied to her message:

_Rey. Thank you for the reply. I have been a member of the message board for a few months now and yours is the first message I have replied to. I feel like I also need to tell you a little about myself as well to reassure you that I am not interested in sex. I am only looking to care for someone the way you want to be cared for. It’s been a long time since I’ve cared for anyone and I think that we could help each other. I live in an apartment in Manhattan with my wife (who is fine with this arrangement and hopefully will reassure you that I am not looking for anything sexual). If you’re really interested, I have a guest bedroom here that would be all yours if you wish to stay with me one night a week. Please let me know._

Rey wasn’t sure how to reply. The fact that he had a wife who was fine with him taking care of a grown woman, was weird, but what part of this situation wasn’t weird? He seemed like he was looking for the same thing she was, and maybe he was right, maybe they could help each other. He was clearly looking for someone to take care of, and while he wasn’t as forthcoming with the reasons, he seemed to feel that this arrangement could be therapeutic to him.

And that was what she chose to see this as -- therapy. Maybe if she learned to let Kylo take care of her, if she could think of him as daddy and get used to his touch, maybe then she could learn to let Finn and Rose hug her. Maybe she could get a boyfriend who would be able to touch her and kiss her without her feeling uncomfortable.

When she thought of it that way, it was a no brainer. She put the voice in the back of her head warning that it was dangerous to go to a strange man’s apartment and replied:

_Hi Kylo. Thank you for clearing up your intentions. I think I want to try this out and if it doesn’t work out, no hard feelings. I am currently doing a summer internship, so weekdays are busy for me. How would Saturdays work for you?_

After replying, Rey had time to cook herself dinner and by the time she sat down, she already had another message:

_Saturdays are best for me too. Would this weekend work for you?_

Rey replied immediately:

_Yes. This weekend is perfect._

Kylo’s reply came fast and Rey knew that somewhere across the city, he was sitting in front of his computer just like she was. Along with the message, he sent a google map to his apartment:

_Perfect. Is there anything you want me to buy for you? What is your favorite color?_

Rey blushed and felt weird at the thought of him buying things for her. The thought of it didn’t quite sit right with her, and maybe it was because she came from nothing, but she felt like she would owe him something if he bought things for her. She wanted to set that straight:

_I don’t need anything, really. Thank you though. I’ll see you on Saturday! (By the way, do you want me to call you daddy?)_

The reply was slow to come and Rey got through several episodes of Guy’s Grocery Games before she began wondering if she’d upset him in her refusal. Finally, as she was brushing her teeth for bed, another message came:

_I want to take care of you. If you don’t have any requests, I’ll pick some things out for you, but if you think of anything, let me know. (Do you want to call me daddy?)_

Rey frowned at his message and thought to ask him again not to buy her anything, but she paused. He’d already assured her he didn’t want sex and other than that, what did a woman owe a man who bought her something? She didn’t like the idea of people spending money on her, but wasn’t that only because no one ever had? If she wanted to look at Kylo as a parent, then she needed to let him take care of her even if that meant with money. She replied:

_Ok, but please don’t go crazy. (Yes. Is that okay?)_

She got one more reply that evening:

_(Yes, it’s fine. Now go to bed.)_

She decided to sent one final reply:

_(Goodnight, daddy.)_

With that, she closed her computer, set it on the night stand and crawled into bed. As she snuggled under the covers, she wondered what it would be like to call him daddy in person and she felt nervous and excited at the prospect. Saturday felt like a lifetime away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. I've boarded the train to hell and decided to try my hand at daddy kink fic.
> 
> Although I've had Rey and Kylo be adamant about the age-play being non-sexual, I'm going to go ahead right now and tell you all that they're fooling themselves. It's gonna get very sexual. Buckle in.
> 
> Please leave me kudos and comments. I live for human interaction XD


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When applicable, I'll add pics of outfits:
> 
> [Rey's dress when meeting Kylo](https://i.imgur.com/EHURgpI.png) | [Rey's Nightgown](https://i.imgur.com/qaJ6JpO.png)

For the next week, Rey tried her hardest not to think about the weekend and finally meeting Kylo Ren. Contact between them during that week had been minimal and Rey got the impression that he was a busy man -- any message she sent was only replied to before sunrise or well after midnight each day. By Wednesday, they’d exchanged phone numbers to move their conversations away from the ageplay forum and Rey learned early that day that her messages didn’t even get read until he seemed to get home from work late at night.

On Thursday night, as she began worrying about what to pack for her trip and whether or not to clue Rose in on what she was doing, she got a text message with Kylo Ren’s address and when Rey googled it, she saw that he was living in a fancy building in Tribeca. While she didn’t consider herself nosey, she wanted to make sure she crossed her t’s and dotted her i’s, so when she looked up exactly how much a building in that neighborhood cost, the tea she was drinking spilled from her mouth down the front of her pajama top. Kylo Ren wasn’t just rich -- he was filthy stinking rich.

She glanced at the outfit she had laid across the bed and frowned. Would he be disappointed when he saw what she looked like or how she dressed? Or that she had no money? Or even worse, if he knew she was poor, would he think she was just doing this for money? She shook her head. There was no way she could have known he was rich when she got into this arrangement and if he suspected that she was up to no good, she’d have to remind him of that.

Then there was the issue of reminding herself it didn’t matter if he thought she was ugly or poor -- that wasn’t the point of this arrangement. The point was for Rey to receive something she’d never gotten as a child -- the care of a parent. She would let him take care of her and she would learn how to receive love and touch from someone in a no-pressure situation. If she couldn’t stand to let him brush her hair or hug her or even praise her, then at least she wasn’t disappointing someone like she had Finn or Rose. Like she would if she ever actually tried to be in a romantic relationship.

There was a fear in the back of her head that it wouldn’t work out. If he was bald and bloated like her foster father Unkar Plutt, she didn’t think she would be able to stand being in the same room with him let alone allow him to put his hands on her. She wasn’t being picky or at least she didn’t  _ think _ she was. When she tried to picture Kylo Ren, she pictured an older man with graying hair and a ‘dad bod’. That would be acceptable, she thought.  _ Anything _ would be acceptable as long as he didn’t look like Unkar Plutt.

The other niggling fear she had was that maybe it wasn’t as low pressure as she kept telling herself it was. She had made it clear that she was not in this for sex and she’d meant it. Kylo, strangely, had seemed not only  _ okay _ with the idea of keeping their arrangement non-sexual, but just as adamant. Rey had absolutely zero experience with men, but this went against everything she’d ever been told about them. If Mr. Ren wasn’t in it for the sex, then what was he hoping to get out of it? Rey didn’t know him well enough to ask and he was supremely private in their messages. She hoped, at least, that he would be less intimidating in person.

With a sigh, she closed her computer and crawled into bed, grabbing her phone and sending a quick message to Kylo, though she knew it would be hours still until he read it.  _ ‘Goodnight daddy.’ _

*****

Friday at the office dragged on for Rey and she knew from her frazzled nerves that it was nature’s way of torturing her. She didn’t think she’d ever felt quite so nervous as she was at the prospect of meeting Kylo Ren -- not when she’d been meeting potential families that would adopt her, not when she first moved to America and certainly not even when she’d interviewed with Skywalker Aviation for the internship.

Now that she knew about Kaydel and Poe’s ‘relationship’, she had a hard time wondering why she hadn’t noticed before the way they looked at each other with desire or whispered to one another when they thought no one was looking. She noticed in the way Kaydel sat on the edge of Poe’s desk, or in the soft expression he gave her as he brought her her favorite candy from the vending machine “just because”. 

All of it made Rey feel jealous and lonely.

By Friday afternoon, Rey decided that she was going to tell Kaydel what she was up to with Kylo Ren. There was no way she would be able to explain to Rose that she was going over to some rich guy’s house to pretend to be a little girl. Her friends would not believe it was innocent and would judge her for being a kinky weirdo. Or even worse, Finn would track her down to Kylo’s penthouse and try something. No, there was no way that Rose or Finn could ever know about her plans with Kylo Ren.

But Kaydel, she wouldn’t judge Rey. She was in her own version of this type of relationship with Poe, though Rey’s arrangement was far more innocent. Kaydel wouldn’t think she was a freak and Rey wouldn’t have to go over to a stranger’s house without someone knowing where she was. It was a win-win, really.

When work let off for the day, Rey found herself following Kaydel into the bathroom. “Oh, Rey! Are you coming to happy hour?”

“Probably,” Rey agreed, peeking under the stalls to make sure that they were alone in the ladies’ room. 

“What are you doing?” Kaydel laughed as she applied lipstick and watched Rey in the mirror.    
  
“Um, I wanted to talk with you in private,” Rey blushed, walking towards the sink and leaning against it as she watched Kaydel for a moment.

“About?” Kaydel asked, sounding amused as she recapped her lipstick and put it in her purse.

“Um… remember last Friday?” Rey asked, wondering how to bring the topic up without sounding rude or nosey.

“Uh yeah. What about it?” Kaydel asked, looking at Rey warily.

Rey looked down at her hands, finding it hard to look Kaydel in the face as she spoke. “You know um, you and Poe and the daddy thing…”

“Oh my God, Rey. It’s not  _ that _ weird!” Kaydel laughed.

“No, no! I know…” Rey said quickly. “It’s just…”

“Just?” Kaydel raised an eyebrow. “Don’t tell me you’re one of those judgemental pru-”

“No! IkindafoundadaddyandIneedadvice,” Rey spat out in a jumbled mess. She wondered for a moment if Kaydel would even be able to understand her and opened her mouth to repeat it slower this time.

But if there was anyone who was able to understand speech at 100 miles a minute, it would be Kaydel Connix. She grinned at Rey, “You didn’t!”

Rey nodded, suddenly feeling stupid for even bringing it up. Kaydel was going to judge her or make fun or her or  _ something. _ “Um, forget I said anything…” She turned to leave, clutching her purse to her side and hoping that the floor would open up to swallow her whole so that she would never have to come back to work and face the humiliation of Kaydel know… Kaydel who would probably tell Poe.

“Oh no you don’t,” Kaydel grinned, grabbing Rey’s purse strap and pulling her back. “You and I are skipping happy hour and going shopping. You’re going to need a new wardrobe!”

Rey let Kaydel lead her out of the bathroom and to the elevator, where Poe was waiting patiently for them. 

“I am ready to drink all of Manhattan,” Poe complained, reaching for Kaydel, who dodged his handsy attempt.

“You’re on your own tonight, Dameron. Rey and I are having a girls’ night,” Kaydel smiled at Rey with a mischievous look.

Poe pouted, “But what about me?”

“You’re not a girl,” Kaydel pointed out.

“I mean, what am I supposed to do?” he complained as the elevator door opened and the three of them climbed in. Once they were safe from prying ears, Poe leaned in towards Kaydel, “You’re going to leave daddy all alone?”

Rey couldn’t help her blush, feeling like a third wheel in a conversation she really should  _ not _ be a part of -- Poe was her boss and hearing him refer to himself as daddy was both surreal and disturbing.

“Sorry, daddy,” Kaydel said with a smirk as the elevator chimed and the doors opened to the first floor. “Girls just wanna have fun!” Before pulling Rey off the elevator, she leaned in and whispered, “You can punish me later.”

Rey didn’t miss the smirk on Poe’s face as Kaydel pulled her out of the elevator. “Rule number one, sometimes you have to act like a brat because punishment is the most fun part of all of this.”

“Punishment?” Rey questioned, then shook her head. “Don’t tell me. I’ll figure it out with Kylo.” She wondered for a minute if the punishment thing would apply to her. Would Kylo want her to act like a brat?

Rey didn’t realize she’d voice her thoughts out loud until Kaydel laughed, “Of course he would. It’s part of the dynamic.”

Rey frowned, unsure of how she felt about being punished. She’d been punished as a child -- slapped, pinched, shoved into walls, starved for days over the most inconsequential things. She shivered, deciding then and there that she did  _ not _ want to be punished for anything. Certain things would have to be taken off the table before she even went to his apartment.

Kaydel must have sensed her apprehension because she patted Rey’s shoulder, “Don’t look so freaked out. You can talk about all of that before it happens. You  _ should _ . And he shouldn’t do anything without your consent, ok? If he tries, call me and Poe and I will come get you.”

Rey nodded, “Um, if it’s okay. Can I give you his address? Someone should know where I am and I feel like my other friends wouldn’t approve.”

Kaydel grinned and wrapped an arm around Rey’s waist. “Of course. Now let’s find you something cute to wear.”

“Oh, uh… I don’t really have…”

Kaydel cut her off before she could get any further. “Don’t worry about it. I have Poe’s credit card. He’ll get the bill and think I bought something for myself…” She patted her purse.

“He’s my boss. I don’t think I should…” Rey fretted. She would hate to think how Poe would really feel if he knew. Or worse yet, what Leia Organa would think! She might get fired or arrested or…

“Rey. I want to do this. We’re friends. Poe won’t know and even if he found out, he wouldn’t care. Trust me.” Kaydel gave Rey a look that left no room for argument and Rey returned the smile as she nodded. Rose and Finn were Rey’s best friends, but she couldn’t help feeling like they wouldn’t be as open-minded as Kaydel was -- there was something in the older woman’s sincerity that put Rey at ease.

“Okay. But one thing, alright? Something cheap…”

*****

  
Somehow by the end of the evening, the one thing that Kaydel had promised to buy for Rey turned into two outfits and a nightgown followed by burgers and shakes. Rey felt guilty about letting someone buy her so much, but Kaydel had preyed on her naivety and convinced her that everything they’d purchased was necessary. To be fair, Rey  _ had _ managed to talk Kaydel out of a collar, a pacifier set and a pair of panties that said ‘Daddy’s Little Girl’ across the butt that made Rey blush to the roots of her hair.

She hadn’t even met the man who would be her daddy (Rey decided it sounded much more wrong when said out loud than it had inside her head) and it was definitely not a sexual arrangement. She didn’t tell Kaydel as much, but had been adamant about not wanting anything too provocative.

Rey didn’t even know why she was going along with all of this other than the fact that Kaydel had more experience than her. In the end, they’d chosen a few pieces that weren’t over the top before indulging in a completely unhealthy dinner.

By the time Rey got back, it was late, but she felt better now that she knew exactly what to pack to bring to Kylo’s. With her new clothes packed safely in her backpack, she brushed her teeth and climbed into bed. In a few short hours, she would be meeting Kylo Ren for the first time and it was honestly shocking that Rey was able to fall asleep at all.

*****

Rey paced back and forth outside of the cafe where she’d agreed to meet Kylo. Being too nervous to show up to his apartment, he’d been the one to offer to meet her in public and then she could make up her mind on whether or not she wanted to come back to his place.

The truth was, she felt weird about the entire situation and had spent the entire morning second guessing herself. Was she just fooling herself into thinking this would help her in the long run? And what about Kylo Ren? He was so mysterious that she had no idea what he wanted out of this. Perhaps he was a pervert and was just telling her what she wanted to hear so that when he finally got her alone, he could do what he wanted and then dismember her bo-

“Rey?” A deep voice called and she froze where she was pacing and looked up at a giant of a man leaning outside of the cafe door. “You’re Rey, right?”

Rey nodded, taking in the man as he actually _ducked_ in the doorway. In all of her conversations with Kylo Ren, she’d never thought to ask his age and had automatically assumed he would be in his fifties and… not hot. He was tall, so tall and broad. She tried her hardest not to notice his thick thighs and big hands and warm eyes because she could _not_ think about him that way if this arrangement was going to work out. She realized she was gaping and closed her mouth, swallowing as he walked towards her. “Uh, Kylo, right?”

He gave a terse nod, “I’ve been watching you pace out here for a few minutes. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, just nervous. Sorry,” Rey admitted.

“It’s okay. I’ve never done anything like this before either. I understand if you’d rather go home,” he offered.

“No,” Rey shook her head quickly. “Um, do you want to go inside and talk?”

“Sure,” he agreed and held out his hand. “Let me carry your backpack?”

Rey was about to tell him she could handle it, but then remembered the whole point of this was learning to let someone take care of her. “Okay.” She slid the pack from her shoulders and handed it over, watching as he grabbed it with one hand, making it look like it weighed absolutely nothing.

He held the door open for her and Rey was glad to see that they were the only ones in the cafe because it meant that they could have a private conversation. “What do you want to drink?”

“Tea?” Rey asked. “With milk and sugar.” 

He nodded and pulled his wallet out as he went to the counter to order. Rey stood awkwardly for a moment, wondering if it was okay to let him pay before remembering how loaded he would have to be to live in this neighborhood. She sat down and crossed her legs under the table. Then she uncrossed them before recrossing them and mentally scolding herself to stop fidgeting. Kylo had already caught her pacing around like an insane person.

When he returned to the table a few minutes later, he set down her tea and placed her backpack on one of the spare chairs before sitting down himself. “So…”

“So…” Rey echoed before lifting the tea to her lips and taking a sip.

“You’re British,” he stated as if the information was a surprise.

  
“Yeah. Grew up in England and came here to go to university,” she explained as she had in every first conversation she’d had with a person since she came to the states.

“What are you studying?” he asked.

“Engineering. Uh, aeronautical engineering, really. I work with planes,” Rey explained, glad to have an ice breaker before they got down into the nitty gritty of why they were here.

Kylo’s eyebrows shot up and Rey frowned, already expecting some sexist comment about how it was so unusual for a woman or questioning the difficulty for a petite woman. “Really?”

“Yes. Is that surprising?” 

“No, no. It’s just a coincidence,” Kylo said in a tone with finality, as though he were unwilling to expand on the topic. 

A silence fell over them and Rey uncrossed her legs again. “So, um, what about you?”

“Oh, I work in finance.”

“Sounds… interesting,” Rey commented, unsure of what to say that wouldn’t sound insulting because it did not, in fact, sound interesting at all.

“It’s not,” Kylo said and smirked when Rey grinned at him.

“But it’s good money, right?”

“Yeah, I suppose,” Kylo agreed in a way that showed how little the subject of money mattered to him. Rey took a moment to eye his tailored suit and thought that the way he carried himself was like a man who had never had to worry about money a day in his life. She didn’t want to be bitter about that, so she changed the subject.

“I like your neighborhood,” Rey commented. “And they make really good tea here.”

“My building is next door so I come here a lot,” he told her and before the cnversation slipped into a lull, he said, “Should we talk details?”

Rey nodded and her eyes darted around the cafe to make sure that no one else was listening in on the conversation. “Alright.”

“So, do you feel comfortable?” he asked awkwardly.

“I guess? I mean, you’re not going to murder me or anything, right?” Rey asked, trying to keep her tone light and playful despite the dark topic.

“Well, I wouldn’t admit if I was, would I?” he joked.

“Right, very reassuring,” she smirked and he gave her a crooked smile in return. “Is there anything you’d like to ask or…?”

“Uh, I’m sure we’ll get to know each other,” Kylo told her and changed the subject quickly, “Is there anything you want to talk about?”

Rey was a master of deflection and she knew that if Kylo didn’t want to ask her personal questions about why she was doing this, it meant that he probably didn’t want to have to answer the same questions. She was fine with tha -- he didn’t need to know every detail of her past right off the bat and she was sure that she would tell him eventually when they grew more comfortable with each other, if it progressed that far. The topic of why could go untouched for now. “Um,” she leaned forward and lowered her voice. “I’m not sure how comfortable I am with um, punishment. Especially if it’s physical…”

“Oh,” his eyebrows shot up in surprise. “I would never… and definitely not without asking first.”

Rey nodded, “Right. I don’t know how these things work and I just wanted to put it out there…”

“Of course,” he agreed easily. “So, what are you comfortable with…?”

Rey could feel her face heating up. She wasn’t sure this would be an easy conversation to have with anyone, let alone someone as attractive as Kylo Ren. Sooner rather than later, she would have to stop thinking about him as attractive and she forced herself to remember that this was  _ not _ a sexual or romantic relationship. “I’m not really sure?” she cringed. “I mean, normal parent child stuff. Like holding hands, forehead kisses, hugs?”

“Ok.”

“Are you okay with that?” Rey asked carefully. He seemed disturbed or maybe unwilling -- she wasn’t sure, but there was some kind of hard-to-read emotion on his face.

“Yeah,” he agreed. “It’s just… new for me.”

“Well, then we’re on the same page,” she pointed out. “And if you’re uncomfortable with anything, tell me, ok?”

“Same for you,” Kylo said and Rey nodded. “Do you want a week to think about it, or…?”

Rey shook her head, “No, no. I don’t really have any plans for the weekend.”

“Do you want to head up, then?”

Rey nodded and stood up, reaching down to grab her backpack. “Let’s go.”

“Let me,” he said and hoisted it up before she had a chance to argue. He put out his hand and Rey looked at it awkwardly for a moment before blinking.

“Oh, right…” she took his hand with a blush and she wasn’t sure which part of the situation embarrassed her the most -- that this was the first real time she’d held hands with a man, that she hadn’t realized what he’d wanted or, most shocking of all, the way her stomach flipped with excitement when she realized how his extremely large hand engulfed her own.

The best plan of action, she decided, was to just not think about any of it. She let him lead her out of the cafe and to his building, conveniently located next door. “I can get you a key made so you can come and go as you like,” he told her, leading her to the elevator and inserting his key.

“Sure,” she agreed, willing her hand not to get sweaty in his. Instead, she decided to focus on the marble floors as the elevator doors opened on the top floor. He was so rich that he lived in a penthouse where the elevator opened straight into his apartment. “Wow,” was all she said.

“It’s not as big as you’re imagining,” he reassured her as he led her through the living room, turning on lights as he went. 

She tried not to scoff at the statement because already the living room was three times as big as her little studio apartment. “Um, is your wife home?”

“Yes,” Kylo said tersely. “She’s in the bedroom. Don’t worry about her, you’ll never even see her.”

“And she’s okay with me staying here?” Rey asked cautiously, sensing that this was a touchy subject.

“It’s fine,” was all he said and Rey had to wonder if she really was okay with this. It wasn’t her place to pry and despite how curious she was, she was  _ not _ going to go digging into his business. He led her down the hall, “Her room… our room, is on the left here. And yours is across the hall.” The door that led to her room was pushed open and Rey was left to gaze around in wonder. The walls were painted a pale yellow and there was a giant dollhouse in the corner and stuffed animals on the bed and if Rey were a child and had been adopted by Kylo and given this room, she would have been on cloud nine. She’d never had a doll let alone such a beautiful dollhouse. “You didn’t tell me your favorite color so I went with yellow. If there’s anything you don’t like…”

“It’s perfect,” Rey said and turned to him with a genuine smile. “Thank you.”

He nodded, and Rey couldn’t help but notice how cute he looked with the blush on his cheeks. “Well, you can put your stuff away and I’ll be in the living room.”

“Okay. I’ll be out in a couple of minutes,” Rey told him, unzipping the bag that he had placed on her bed as she watched him close the door. 

*****

“Shit,” Ben muttered, running a hand through his hair as he leaned against the wall in the hallway. “Shit, shit, shit.”

Rey was… gorgeous. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had such a visceral reaction to a woman. Maybe he never had.

When he saw her pacing outside of the cafe, he’d watched her with the interest any man would an attractive woman. His eyes had lingered too long on the lean, tan legs peeking out of her pink pinafore dress and it wasn’t until he had been watching her pace for a few minutes that he realized it was probably Rey.

He had been expecting someone he would not be at all physically attracted to -- maybe someone awkward and ungroomed or tattooed and pierced… he wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting but it hadn’t been Rey. Shy, nervous, sweet, beautiful Rey…

This wasn’t going to work, Kylo knew already. Just the sound of her voice had his libido spiking and holding her tiny little hand in his hand had already made him think things that he should absolutely not be thinking about -- like how her little fist would look wrapped around his cock. He could already picture how pink her cheeks would get as he taught her how to squeeze and pump him until…

No. He couldn’t go there. She had made it clear she was not interested in anything sexual. He had promised her that it wouldn’t be sexual and here he was thinking about one of many ways he could defile her. 

He had to stop thinking of her as a sexual adult and start thinking of her as a child. That would kill any dirty thoughts on the spot. He’d start with making her lunch and then maybe showing her some of the things he’d bought.

He put some distance between Rey’s bedroom and himself as he walked towards the kitchen. Grabbing everything he needed from the cupboards, he set about making her a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

“What’s for lunch, daddy?” Rey’s voice came from the doorway and Kylo had to stifle a groan. He was not expecting her to sound so erotic when she called him daddy and he had to wonder what was wrong with him. He did  _ not _ have a daddy kink… did he?

“Uh, PB&J,” he answered, quickly cutting off the crusts to distract himself.

“Yum,” Rey hummed and stood next to him at the counter.

He handed her the plate, “Why don’t you go sit in the living room and I’ll get you a glass of milk?”

Rey nodded and took the plate, heading out of the room. Ben exhaled through his nose and reached into the cupboard for a glass. This definitely was not going to work…

When he got to the living room, Rey was sitting at the coffee table on her knees, taking dainty bites from her sandwich and Kylo had trouble picturing her as a child when even the way she ate a sandwich was somehow sexy. “Is it good?” he asked, setting the glass down.

“Mmmhmm,” Rey agreed, reaching for the glass of milk to wash it down. “Thank you.”

He grabbed a plastic bag from the couch and pulled out the contents, “I wasn’t sure what you’d like. I bought coloring books, legos…”

“Legos!” Rey’s face lit up. “I always wanted to play with Legos!”

Kylo blinked, “You never played with Legos?”

She shook her head and put her sandwich down to reach for the giant box. “A treehouse? This is so cool. Can we put it together now?”

Kylo smiled at her enthusiasm and it was a strange feeling to be proud of picking out a toy that thrilled her so much. He wrote it off as the same joy a parent would feel to see their child’s excitement and nothing more. “Finish eating first.”

Rey nodded and picked up her sandwich, taking a big bite and barely chewing before swallowing.

Kylo actually laughed before realizing that today was the first time he’d laughed so much in, God, who knows how long. He didn’t think he’d laughed  _ at all _ in the past two years. “Slow down or you’ll choke.”

She nodded and reached for the glass of milk, using it as a lubricant to help her swallow the ridiculously large bite she was still working on. 

Kylo took the box off the table and opened it, taking out the separated packs of legos and laying them out across the floor. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Rey watching his every move and smirked when he saw her go back to taking giant bites of her sandwich. In some ways, she really was like a kid.

As soon as she finished her sandwich, she crawled out of her spot from the other side of the table and joined him where he was laying out all of the pieces. She reached for the instructions, her forehead wrinkling as she looked at the diagrams. “Wow. This is going to take a while.”

“We don’t have to start now,” Kylo said and laughed at the unimpressed look she gave him.

“We’re starting now,” she told him and grabbed the bag labeled with a number 1 and began to rip it open.

“Hey! Don’t just rip the bag,” he scolded, taking it away and carefully opening it at the notch.

“Control freak,” Rey muttered under her breath but let him open the bag as she laid out the instructions in front of her.

She sat cross legged and watched as Ben dumped the contents of packet 1 on the hardwood floors, and when he looked up, he couldn’t help but notice that her position caused her dress to ride up and now her panties were on full display.

She seemed completely oblivious as she started assembling pieces and Ben’s throat felt drier than the desert. How could a pair of the most basic white cotton panties be such an erotic sight? He leaned back on his palms, under the guise of watching her work, but his eyes kept drifting back to peek up her dress. He should stop, he knew he should stop, but when she reached for another packet, the thin fabric of her panties pulled tight across her cleft and his mind went blank as he could very clearly see the defined lips of her vulva.

“Daddy?”

He looked up and blushed, hoping she wouldn’t notice where he’d been staring. “Huh?”

“Can you open this?” she asked, holding the bag out for him.

He cleared his throat before saying, “Yes.” It appeared that she hadn’t caught him staring between her legs and he made a concentrated effort not to let his eyes wander back.

“Did you play with Legos as a kid?” she asked as she took the bag back from his outstretched hand and dumped the blocks in the space between them.

“Yeah,” he said. “They were my favorite.” Rey nodded and continued to assemble in silence. “What about you? What kind of toys did you play with?”

She frowned and then shrugged, “I didn’t have a lot of toys. I played outside a lot, I guess. And I liked playing with tools, taking stuff apart. But I don’t suppose that counts as toys.”

Ben thought there was more there, but decided he wasn’t going to press her for personal information. Not yet anyway. “If it was fun, it counts. Have you ever played with Erector sets?”

She shook her head, “Nope.”

“I’ll buy you some,” he promised. She was an engineer and she liked legos so he imagined that she would have a lot of fun with an Erector set.

“You don’t have to keep buying me stuff,” Rey told him with a frown.

“I don’t have to, but I want to. You’ve never been spoiled before, so let me spoil you.” The idea clearly made Rey uncomfortable but Kylo was unwilling to budge. He had more money than he knew what to do with and while he didn’t know Rey’s whole story, it was clear she was in this arrangement because something had been lacking in her childhood.

If she had a problem with his declaration, she said nothing and they continued working on the lego set, making small talk here and there, until dinnertime. “What do you want for dinner?”

“Are you going to cook?” Rey asked curiously.

Kylo nodded, “I’m pretty good.”

“Then surprise me,” Rey smiled.

“Okay. Clean up our mess and I’ll get dinner started,” Kylo suggested as he stood up and headed towards the kitchen. By the time he finished making dinner, Rey had cleaned up the Legos, placed their half-built treehouse on a shelf and was sitting at the table patiently. “Did you wash your hands?”

Rey nodded, holding up her hands for Kylo to see as he set their plates on the dinner table. “Yep.”

“Good girl,” Kylo praised, taking his seat and putting his napkin on his lap, smiling as Rey blushed and did the same.

“Um, is your wife going to eat?” Rey’s eyes darted down the hallway towards the bedroom where his wife lay.

Kylo shook his head. Caroline wouldn’t bother coming out for dinner. He’d put a plate of food in the fridge for her and maybe she’d eat it at some point when she was hungover or tired of wasting away. He didn’t care anymore.

Rey looked unsure, but she didn’t press the issue as she twirled a ridiculous amount of spaghetti around her fork and shoved it into her mouth. Kylo was about to scold her for her manners when her face melted in pure bliss. “Ohmf mah gah…”

“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” he said, trying not to laugh. It was hard to chastise her when everything she did was so cute.

“Sorry,” she said once she swallowed it. “This is really good.”

“Good,” he smiled and started eating his own. He was only halfway done when Rey was scraping her plate clean. “I can get you some more, you know…”

“I shouldn’t,” she said, eyeing her plate like she wanted to like the sauce from it.

“Do you want more?” he asked her, alreadying knowing the answer before she nodded. “I’ll get you some,” he took her plate and without thinking, leaned down to kiss the top of her head. He didn’t stay to see her reaction because he was wondering himself what had possessed him to do it. He wasn’t this comfortable around strangers, and Rey was practically a stranger. Maybe it was because they’d talked earlier about hugs and forehead kisses? Or maybe the situation just brought out his paternal side?

As he made her another plateful, he decided he just wasn’t going to think about things so much. This was an odd arrangement, and they’d have to just go with the flow. If something he did bothered her, he would have to trust that she would tell him. He brought the plate back to the table and set it down in front of her, receiving a quiet, “Thank you.”

*****

After dinner, Rey helped him load the dishwasher and they sat down on the couch in the living room together. “What do you like to watch?” he asked.

“Um, you can pick.”

“I want to know what you like,” he insisted.

“I like to watch cooking shows,” she admitted. “I can’t cook or afford to eat out so my friends and I just drool over food-related tv programs.”

Kylo laughed and turned on Food Network, “Okay. We can watch for a while and then you need to get ready for bed.”

Rey nodded and made herself comfortable on her side of the lap. Kylo was tempted to pull her closer, maybe let her snuggle in with him, but that wasn’t appropriate. He shouldn’t want those things with someone he’d just met and especially not with a woman he was supposed to have a non-sexual relationship with.

After an hour of some dumb cook-off show, Kylo turned off the tv. “Ready for bed?”

“Yeah,” Rey stretched like a cat from her spot on the couch before standing up. “Um, I couldn’t help noticing the tub in my ensuite. Would you mind if I took a bath?”

Kylo froze, “Um, sure…” He followed Rey to her bedroom and watched as she pulled her pajamas out of her drawer, shifting from foot to foot. “Can I wait in here for you?”

She gave him an odd look but nodded, “Okay.” 

He sat on the edge of the bed and swallowed, “And would you mind…” He stopped and looked at the floor.

“What?” Rey asked, tilting her head.

“Could you uh, leave the door open?” he asked, unable to meet her eyes.

“Uh…”

“I won’t watch you or look, I promise…” Kylo said quietly. “I’ll be on my phone the whole time. I’ve got some emails to answer.” He pulled it out of his pants pocket and held it up as if to verify.

Rey looked unsure but eventually nodded, “Okay…”

“Thank you,” he smiled weakly and purposefully looked down at his phone as Rey went into the bathroom. He ignored the running water and the sound of rustling fabric. He ignored when he heard the water turn off and the splash of Rey climbing into the water. It wasn’t until he heard her relaxed sigh that he looked up. 

Rey was stretched out in the bathtub, her head leaned back against the edge and her eyes closed. He was tempted to try for a better look, but decided not to risk breaching her trust. Tearing his eyes away, he got to work on answering his emails and ignored the temptation to look up every time he heard a splash.

He was so absorbed in his work that he barely noticed when Rey came padding back into the room in a nightgown that Kylo thought was strangely innocent and erotic at the same time. “Come sit,” he said and patted the bed next to him.

Rey blushed and sat down with some hesitancy and he realized that maybe she thought he was up to no good. To clear up any misunderstanding, he held up the hairbrush he was holding and her shoulders immediately relaxed as she caught on. “Thank you.”

He shook his head and began brushing out her hair. “That feels really nice,” she commented after a few moments of brushing.He just smiled in response and set the brush aside as he began braiding it. 

When he finished Rey turned and looked at herself in the mirror, “Wow! You can do hair too?”

“Just braids,” he said with a headshake. “I used to braid my mom’s hair.”

Rey just smiled at her reflection and reached up to touch her braids. The smile on her face was so genuine and her expression so soft that Kylo wondered if anyone had ever braided her hair before. Her childhood was such an enigma, but what he’d put together from their interactions had him assuming that it wasn’t great. 

He stood up and motioned for her to do the same. Once he had her blankets pulled back, she crawled into bed and pulled them back over her, tucking them around her shoulders. “Goodnight, Rey.”

He stood and turned off the light, a small smile on his lips as she said quietly, “Night, daddy.”

*****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I just want to note that any biases based on physical appearances in this chapter are not my own and are only meant to highlight how much they are one another's "type". I have nothing against balding or pudgy men. Nor do I find awkward (hello me lol) women or tattooed/pierced women unattractive)
> 
> Please leave a comment and like below and I'll see you next time! <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did a little updating to the tags, so make sure you read them before proceeding! I hate for people to get to invested only to realize down the road that there might be something triggering in the story!

Rey was dreaming, she was sure, because all she saw were fragments. Fragments of Kylo Ren’s hands -- brushing through her hair, rubbing her shoulders, gripping her hips, buried between her legs -- which was odd because as touch starved as Rey was, she never had sexual dreams. One could argue that her dream barely passed into scandalous territory, and perhaps that was because she had zero experience, but for Rey, the sight of his large digits brushing against her was the single most erotic sight she’d ever witnessed -- er, dreamt.

She could feel the heat and wetness pooling between her thighs and could see Kylo dragging his thick fingers along her swollen lips as his husky voice chanted her name.

“Rey,” Kylo’s whisper broke through her dream. “Rey, wake up.”

With some difficulty, she managed to shake herself from the dream and blink up as Kylo sat on the edge of her bed, bent over her. “Hmm?” she groaned, rubbing her thighs together, because yes she was definitely aroused.

“It’s time to wake up, sunshine,” He said quietly as Rey sat up in her bed.

From outside the room, somewhere nearby, Rey heard the sound of glass crashing and breaking. “What’s going on?” she asked, wiping the sleep from her eyes.

“Don’t worry about it. Get dressed and I’ll take you out for breakfast,” he said, standing quickly and glancing at the door in a delicate mixture of worry and anger.

Rey looked to the door with wide eyes as a screech erupted, followed by more glass breaking. “Is that your…?”.

“Get dressed,” Kylo repeated, with more authority in his voice this time. “Be a good girl and listen to daddy.”

Rey nodded and crawled out of bed as Kylo left the room, a shiver running down her spine from his words and she had to force herself to stop thinking about her damned dream. She shucked her nightgown off and unzipped her backpack, pulling her dress on and skipping her bra altogether in desperation to follow Kylo’s command.

The door across the hall slammed shut and Rey flinched. Had Kylo lied to her about his wife’s approval of their arrangement? Had she found out about Rey’s presence and was now on a murderous rampage?

And even if his wife was truly okay with this entire situation, there was the guilt of having raunchy sex dreams about a married man.

Yesterday had been wonderful. Rey couldn’t remember the last time she’d slept so well. Maybe she’d never slept as well because she’d never been as thoroughly cared for as she was the day before. No one had ever bought her such nice gifts, cooked meals for her, or so much as tucked her in at night.

As she caught her reflection in the mirror, she reached up to touch the plait that Kylo had braided into her hair and smiled. It was too pretty to take out, so she patted down the flyaways and grabbed her backpack. Maybe this would be the last time she saw Kylo. She hoped it wasn’t because one night wasn’t enough for her. The disappointment was already settling in her chest at the thought.

With one last look around her bedroom, hoping it wasn’t the last, Rey dragged the straps of her backpack up her shoulders and headed for the door.

*****

Kylo should have known that hiding the booze would be a mistake, but he had expected Rey to be safely away from the apartment before Caroline woke up from her hangover. Clearly, he had miscalculated his wife’s need for the bottle and now Rey would see the aftermath.

He’d only hidden it to keep Rey from asking questions or becoming worried. What would she have thought if she walked into his apartment to see it littered with half empty bottles? Surely, the red flags would have sent her running. 

Caroline had been well and fully liquored up by the time he had left to meet Rey at the cafe, and he had been sure to leave a bottle of vodka on the nightstand to keep her from emerging throughout the day. 

He didn’t think Caroline would mind Rey’s presence, nor would she even notice it. She was always too drunk and even if she thought he was having an affair, she wouldn’t care. Caroline cared only about herself.

He did, however, care what Rey thought. He didn’t want to have to answer a million questions, or explain why he was still with his wife when he clearly didn’t love her, or what had driven him to even wanting to be in a relationship like this with Rey. Those were answers he kept to himself, and it would stay that way.

He looked up from where he was sitting on the arm of the couch as Rey opened her bedroom door and crept down the hallway. “What happened?”

Kylo shook his head and held out his hand, “Don’t worry about it.”

“Kylo, is everything ok?” Rey asked hesitantly.

“Yes,” he said, dropping the hand he’d held out and frowning.

“What is going on?” Rey asked, looking around at the shattered glass on the floor. She waited patiently, but Kylo couldn’t find the words. She watched as he clenched his fist and said, “Am I safe here?”

His gaze snapped to her, “Yes. I wouldn’t bring you here if it wasn’t safe.”

She hesitated again, “I don’t feel safe.”

“I said you are, damnit!” Kylo roared and Rey flinched. He reeled in his anger, letting the self-loathing calm his rage. “You are safe. I made a mistake.”

“Does your wife not want me here?” Rey asked timidly.

“Come with me to breakfast,” he held out his hand again. “You can ask me whatever you want about my wife and then we’ll never talk about it again, ok?”

Rey looked at his hand and for a few achingly long seconds, he thought she was going to refuse to take it but then she took a step forward and extended her own hand, placing her palm against his. Ben’s fingers closed around her hand immediately, as if he was afraid she would change her mind, and he pulled her towards the door.

*****

Rey let Ben lead her to the elevator, let him carry her backpack, let him march her to the cafe around the corner, all in the company of silence. She tried to be patient as he did nothing but frown and chew the inside of his cheek, she didn’t say anything as he glared at the menu or when the waiter darted past their table, too nervous to stop and ask for their order. Finally, she couldn’t keep waiting so she tentatively asked, “Kylo?”

His eyes snapped up, but his face softened. “Rey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you earlier.”

“It’s okay,” Rey said, even though it wasn’t. His anger had almost been scarier than whatever it was that she’d woken up to. But yesterday had been so wonderful that Rey felt more anxious about losing that then anything. “What’s going on?”

Kylo sighed, his eyes dropping down to the menu. “My wife… she isn’t well.”

“What’s wrong with her?” Rey asked, her stomach twisting in knots at the realization that while she’d been having dirty dreams about Kylo, his wife was sick. Even worse, they were having breakfast while she was having some kind of episode.

“She’s an alcoholic,” Kylo ground out.

“Oh.” She didn’t know what to say to that, but it explained a lot, like why she’d been shut up in a room by herself or why she hadn’t even come out to drink. Rey had seen enough drunks in her lifetime to know how the bottle could ruin a person’s life. “I’m sorry.” Rey wasn’t sure what else she could say. She didn’t know how to help him, or even comfort him. He’d been so wonderful to her the day before and she could think of nothing to say but ‘sorry’.

Kylo shook his head at her words, “It’s nothing to be sorry about. I don’t know what to do anymore.” He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “I should have been more honest with you from the start. I didn’t think I would have to explain this all so soon.”

“We don’t have to talk about it now,” Rey offered.

“We do. Because you might not want to come back to see me again if we don’t. And I want you to come back, Rey.” He finally put down the menu and really looked at Rey and she was startled by how intense his gaze was. No one had ever looked at her like that before, like she had all the power in the world to crush him if she said she would never come back.

Which meant that Kylo had enjoyed her company just as much as she enjoyed his. It was hard not to forget about the morning, or even how heavy of a topic they were in the middle of, when she felt so inexplicably happy to know that he wanted her to come back. She bit back the smile tugging at her lips because she knew it wouldn’t be appropriate. She reached across the table, covering his mammoth hand with hers. “I want to come back, too.”

“Then I need you to know that you are safe,” he told her. “Caroline, she’s harmless. She won’t hurt you, she’s too out of her mind.”

“And you’re okay with that?” Rey asked tentatively. “Isn’t there something you could do? Family or…?”

“I don’t have any family,” he told her immediately and then quickly moved on before she pushed the subject further. “And Caroline’s family is… apathetic to the issue.”

Rey nodded, “Is there anything I can do…?”

Kylo shook his head. “No. She’s not your burden.”

Now more than ever, Rey found herself wondering why Kylo had decided to get himself involved in a relationship like this with her. Before she lost her nerve, she asked, “What are you getting out of this?”

Kylo’s expression took on a far away look and Rey was worried that she’d crossed a line. After a few moments, his eyes slid back to hers, “I want to learn to take care of someone. To fix my mistakes.” The response was quiet and earnest and Rey knew that he must have been talking about Caroline.

“You must love her very much,” Rey said, hoping that her voice didn’t betray the envy she felt. It wasn’t that she was jealous that Kylo loved someone so dearly, of course not. He was her play ‘daddy’ and not a lover, so what reason was there to feel even an ounce of jealousy over his devotion? It had to be that she was jealous of that dedication, Rey thought, because she had never had that. A perfectly reasonable excuse for what she was feeling.

“Who?” Kylo asked, shaking his head as if withdrawing from his thoughts and returning to their conversation.

“Caroline.” 

“Hmm,” was all Kylo said in response and Rey thought that he must be addressing her assumption with some type of disagreement or disapproval.

Kylo had said that she could ask him anything about his wife, and this was technically about his wife, but as she opened her mouth to ask for clarification, the waiter stopped to take their orders. By the time he walked away, Kylo’s shoulders had untensed and the lines between his eyebrows relaxed. She didn’t have the heart to continue on with the topic so she asked, “Are we good for next weekend then or…?”

“Yes,” he said immediately, and Rey thought, a little desperately. “As long as you’re comfortable with that?”

Rey nodded shyly, setting aside her menu. “I trust you,” she informed him before her voice dropped to a whisper and she added, “daddy.”

Kylo looked extremely pleased with that and took his chance to move on from their conversation about Caroline. “I was thinking that I’d get you some erector sets for next time. And maybe some clothes or pajamas that you can just keep in your room.”

This time, she knew better than to argue or try to talk Kylo out of buying her anything. First of all, he was rich and secondly, it seemed to make him happy to be able to provide for her. And that was a new experience for Rey too. If he had the money, was it wrong to let herself be taken care of? “Okay.”

“You can send me links to things and I’ll buy you whatever you want,” he told her eagerly, and the thought made Rey uncomfortable. He must have sensed that, because he quickly followed up with, “Don’t worry about money. Let me take care of you.”

She had trouble putting into words why it bothered her so much that he wanted to buy her things. Because he was a stranger and didn’t know her? Because nothing came free and he must want  _ something _ in exchange? Because it was hard to imagine that anyone would care enough to give her something she wanted when no one had cared enough to give her what she needed? Instead, all she settled for was, “I feel bad.”

“Don’t,” he said simply.

She wanted to argue, but bit her tongue. “Fine. But you pick something for me, ok? That way I can think of it as a gift and not a handout.”

“Alright,” he agreed, and the subject was dropped again as the waiter brought their food to the table.

*****

The rest of Sunday passed uneventfully -- Kylo walked her to the train station and when she got home she finished up all of her laundry and went to bed early, trying not to think about how it would be another five long days before she got to see him again.

On Monday morning, Kaydel was waiting by her desk, almost bouncing with excitement. As soon as Rey dropped her bag on the desk, her friend was grinning and getting way too close for comfort. “Sooo? How was your first weekend with daddy?”

Rey could feel her whole face go red, “Kay! Shhh oh my god, if someone hears you right now.”

“No one is going to hear. But it was good right?” Kaydel waggled her eyebrows. “You definitely have a glow.”

“It was… nice,” Rey smiled, and when she thought back to their day together, it made it easy to forget all about the drama of Sunday morning.

“Did you let him span--” Kaydel began with a smile before being interrupted by Poe.

“Han is here today,” he explained and when Rey looked around, she noticed that the office definitely had an excited buzz. It was rare that Han showed up around the office, but when he did, everyone knew that it was basically a party day.

“Have you seen him?” Rey asked, looking around.

“In Leia’s office,” he nodded towards the door and Rey had to lean around Kaydel to look in. Leia was rising from her desk, looking exasperated about something that Han was saying. And Han, well, he was sitting in a chair with his feet propped up on her desk and his arms behind his head. Even well into his sixties, Rey thought she’d never seen a guy quite as cool as Han. Well, maybe Kylo, but he was still a close second.

They watched as Leia threw her hands up in exasperation and then stormed out of her office, sending all of the employees hoping to get a look at the legendary pilot off in a scurry. “I’m going to kill that man!” she growled as she stomped over to wear Poe, Rey and Kaydel were standing.

“What is he doing now?” Poe smirked. Watching Han and Leia fight was obviously not a new phenomenon for him.

“He’s driving me nuts! Ever since he retired, he’s always just… there,” Leia sighed.

“Maybe if you’d let me take the plane out,” Han complained as he sauntered out of his office.

“You are an  _ old man _ ,” she snapped.

“Yeah, well you’re no spring chicken either, princess,” he shot back and as shocking as it was to see the couple she idolized fighting, it was clear that this was just their dynamic.

“You know what I mean! You had a heart attack two months ago. You are in no shape to be flying a plane!” Leia argued as she jabbed a finger right into his chest, above said heart.

“I have an idea,” Poe stepped in before they caused even more of a scene than they already were. “Rey, your senior project… the Albatross? Why don’t you take Han to go see it?”

“Oh I don’t know,” Rey said, chewing her lip. “I’m not supposed to let anyone touch my project. And if they knew that  _ the  _ Han Solo was there, I might get accused of…” she trailed off before she ended up sounding like too much of a fangirl.

“Ah, come on, kid,” Han said, his face lighting up at the thought of seeing an real Albatross. “I bet I can even put in a good word with your professors.”

Rey looked to Leia, hoping the other woman would talk some sense into her husband, but she was met with a hopeful look. As though she was  _ dying _ for someone to take her husband off her hands for a while. “Fine. But you’re buying me lunch.”

“Yeah, yeah. Sure,” he waved his hand as Rey gathered up her purse and headed for the elevators.`

By the time they made it to her campus, Rey had forgotten all about the academic ramifications of letting an actual plane mechanic touch her project. Han was charming and funny and honestly, everything she’d ever wanted in a dad. In a lot of ways, she saw glimpses of Han in Kylo and maybe that was why she had enjoyed his company so much over the weekend.

The chassis of the Albatross had been removed to expose the rotary engine and as soon as Han laid eyes on it, he picked up a wrench from the cloth on Rey’s workbench in the engineering hangar. “Hand it over,” she gave him a look and he reluctantly gave her the tool. “You can give advice, but you can’t touch.”

Han shrugged, “I’ll take what I can get. To tell you the truth, Leia’s driving me nuts too.”

Rey snorted, “I always thought you guys were the perfect couple.”

“We are,” he grinned. “But when you’ve been married as long as we have, sometimes you need a break. And we've been together  _ all  _ the time since I had the heart attack. Getting old sucks. Don’t do it, kid.”

Rey laughed as she wiggled into her coveralls, “What about your son? He must be around to help.”

Han froze and looked at Rey like she’d grown a second head. “Our son?”

“Yeah, you have a son, right? I remember hearing that somewhere,” Rey glanced over her shoulder and finally noticed his pale face. “Oh, I’m sorry. Did I say something wrong?”

Han shook his head, as if trying to rid himself of his shock. “No it’s just. Our son, he’s  _ estranged _ . I haven’t seen him in years. Didn’t even come visit his old man in the hospital.”

Rey frowned, “I’m sorry, Han. I didn’t mean to bring up bad memories.” She needed to learn when to keep her mouth shut. She was only glad that she hadn’t brought him up in front of Leia. It was one thing to make that mistake around someone as laid back as Han, but if she had done it in front of her boss, she might not have an internship much longer.

“It’s fine. I just… haven’t thought about Ben in a long time. It wasn’t a shock that he didn’t show up,” Han shrugged.

“It isn’t fine,” Rey insisted. “He should have come to see you. He didn’t know if it would be his last chance, and he still didn’t show.” Rey felt bad enough about the turn of events that she didn’t try to argue this time as Han picked a tool and started fiddling with the engine.

“If there’s one thing I know about Ben, it's that he’s very stubborn. Gets that from his mother,” Han winked at her. “I made plenty of mistakes with him. I wasn’t there when he needed me either, and I’ll always have to live with that.”

“Hmm. You could always apologize?” Rey suggested.

“Yeah, I don’t think a sorry will cut it. I didn’t go to his wedding, so I can’t exactly complain,” Han explained. “Hand me the flashlight,” he told Rey, holding his hand out.

Rey grabbed the flashlight from her workbench and shined it on the engine for Han. “Why didn’t you go to his wedding?”

Han buried his head in the engine and barked, “A little to the left,” and when Rey moved the flashlight he continued, “Didn’t like his girl.”

“Ah,” Rey nodded. To someone with no family, that desperately  _ wanted _ a family, she couldn’t say she understood the situation. If she had a family, no amount of disagreements would stand in the way. And it was a little disappointing to know that her childhood idol couldn’t even figure out how to be a good dad. “So you refused to go because you didn’t agree with who he was marrying?”

“In simplest terms, yeah. But it wasn’t just the girl. It was his boss and his job and the girl and the entire direction his life was headed,” Han explained and she thought that maybe he’d needed to get all of this out in the open for a while.

“So you  _ didn’t _ go because you care?” Rey asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I mean, it sounds dumb when you say it like that, but yeah. He was just making so many mistakes with his life and Leia and I couldn’t be supportive of it.”

“Did you try talking to him?” Rey asked.

“Again: very stubborn,” Han joked.

“Yeah,” Rey said, but it didn’t sit right with her. She wanted to think that Han was a better dad than just walking away and letting his son make mistakes. He was a good person, she knew that. And Leia was too. So it was hard to believe that they’d raised a son who they seemed to feel was so irredeemable. “It’s never too late though, right?” Rey ventured.

“He wouldn’t even answer if I were to call,” Han said.

“So you just give up?” Rey pressed.

“Boy, you’re a nosey little thing, aren’t you?” Han teased.

“Sorry,” she squeaked, trying to hide her blush. The situation was none of her business and she knew when to stop. A line had been crossed and this seemed to be Han’s last warning to drop the subject, so she did.

In the end, Han spent most of the morning working on her plane engine, mostly because she felt guilty for upsetting him earlier, but also because he was an expert in the field and had pinpointed a problem with the rotary blade she hadn’t even noticed. 

Afterwards, he took her out for a late lunch, promising that he knew where to find the best pastrami sandwich in all of New York City. The sandwich was damn good, and the conversation was much lighter. He told her stories from what he called ‘the glory days’ and promised that he’d get Luke drunk at one of the Friday happy hours so she could hear his drunken rendition of I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That).

After lunch, Leia had assured Rey that she didn’t need to bother coming in and that babysitting her husband was enough work for one day, so after lunch, Rey decided to head home and relax.

On the way home, she picked up a few groceries with the full intention of hunkering down for the night. After a quick shower, she settled into the couch with her laptop so that she could finish the latest season of The Great British Bake Off when her phone vibrated on the table.

She reached for it and fought back a smile when she saw that it was from Kylo -- It was unusual to get a text message from him during the day like this. She opened it immediately.

_ ‘I bought you some clothes and pajamas for this weekend. So you don’t need to bring anything. Unless you need to.’ _

Their conversation had been less than twenty-four hours ago, and already he’d followed through on his promise. She wrestled down the guilty feeling of someone spending money on her, and truthfully it wasn’t a hard feeling to squash. More than guilt, she felt touched. No one had ever provided anything they weren’t legally obligated to for her and here was Kylo, buying her clothes she didn’t even  _ need. _ And if he’d turned around and done it so quickly, he must have been thinking about her and that was a new feeling for Rey too. She almost couldn’t imagine Kylo sitting in his office, shopping online for clothes for her. He must have taken time out of his usually busy work schedule, and she knew it was busy given how infrequently and late at night his replies usually came, to pick out and purchase clothes for her.

That gave her a tingly feeling because it felt so… personal. She wondered what kind of clothes he picked out. What did he want to see her wear? Would it be along the same lines as what Kaydel had picked out for her? Or would he dress her in more age appropriate clothes? Her mind was all over the place as she tried to imagine what he would choose and whether he would like how she looked in it all.

She had no idea how long she spent on the couch before she finally pulled herself together enough to type out a reply that she thought he would like. ‘ _ Thank you for taking care of me, daddy.’ _

The reply to that came quickly and Rey knew that he must have been waiting.  _ ‘You’re welcome, sweetheart.’ _

Rey would be lying if she said her pulse didn’t skyrocket through the roof at the nickname, and her hands were almost shaking as she typed up a reply. She deleted it and retyped no fewer than three times before finally hitting send.  _ ‘I can’t wait to see you.’ _

The reply didn’t come until several hours later, when Rey was tucked into bed and half asleep, watching youtube videos on her phone. She smiled sleepily as she read it,  _ ‘Me neither. Goodnight, little one.’ _

*****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a kudos/comment if you enjoyed the chapter! I also have a Twitter so [follow me](https://twitter.com/jeeaysee0925) there!
> 
> The next chapter: 
> 
> Rey and Kylo spend another Saturday night together and the sexual tension increases.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rey's pajamas from this chapter:  
> [](https://imgbb.com/)

  
  


Kylo was aware somewhere in the back of his mind that he was becoming a little obsessed in his endeavor to buy things for Rey. It started out as casual browsing on his computer during his lunch break, but quickly devolved into clearing his entire Monday afternoon schedule so he could finish.

Picking out toys had been the easy part -- he had a more solid idea of what Rey liked now so he bought her three more lego sets and the biggest erector set he could find. He threw in some more coloring books and thought briefly about buying her a Nintendo Switch, but didn’t like the idea of her attention focused on anything but him. There was a niggling voice in the back of his mind that this possessive thought  _ should _ be more concerning than he was treating it, but that he chose to ignore for the time being, in the same way he was choosing to ignore the fact that Rey was occupying most of his waking brain.

The more difficult task was choosing clothes because Kylo kept waffling between what  _ he _ wanted to see Rey wear (pinafore dresses, short pleated skirts and over-the-knee socks) and what was actually appropriate.

That was the most difficult thing of all, because Kylo was willing to admit that he had plenty of inappropriate thoughts about Rey. One thing he hadn’t counted on was how attracted he would be towards her. It had been easy to proclaim that he hadn’t wanted anything sexual before he’d met her. She had just been some random, faceless woman he’d hoped could mend a broken piece of him. Instead, she’d awoken something more carnal in him that he was having trouble stifling.

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d surrounded himself with such warmth and maybe that was what he was so taken with -- her smile, how willing she was to hold his hand and listen to him, the trust she had when she looked at him. That was a big part, he knew, because how long had it been since someone had looked at him with such trust?

He hadn’t forgotten the reason why he’d started this relationship with Rey and her trust meant more than she could ever possibly know. Which was why he knew it was wrong to be thinking about Rey the way he was -- she didn’t want him that way and had made it clear from the start.

And yet, as he found more outfits he was itching to see her in, he couldn’t help but wonder what was the harm in enjoying the way she looked? He could admire her, fantasize about her even, as long as he made up his mind not to cross any lines. It was possible to hope for more glimpses of her panties, to dress her in short skirts, to let his eyes linger longer than they should on her perky little tits. He may be a pervert, but he was determined to protect Rey and the trust she’d put in him.

He’d shaken away any guilt he felt over the idea of enjoying Rey parading around in the outfits he bought her and continued loading his cart full. It gave him something to do other than count down the days until Saturday when he’d get to see her next and it was almost like Christmas coming home to several packages after work every day.

When Friday came rolling around, he found himself nervous with the anticipation of seeing Rey and hoping that she’d like it all. If he was honest with himself, he didn’t want to wait to find out so he opened his messages and sent one to Rey:  _ What are you doing tonight? _

*****

Rey had been worried that she would be thinking all week about spending Saturday with Kylo, so she was thankful for her latest task with Skywalker Aviation: babysitting Han Solo. Any other person would probably be disappointed about being constantly sent out of the office, but for Rey, it was a pleasure -- she got to get paid for working on her senior project  _ and _ she had the expertise of Han Solo.

When her professors and advisor had caught wind of Han’s presence in the hangar, Rey had feared that it would affect her academic integrity, but if anything, it only boosted her reputation in the department. Of course, most of the stodgy old engineering professors were eager fanboys of the ex-pilot and she almost wanted to laugh every time one of them tripped over themselves to bring him coffee or hand him a tool. From the secretive looks Han would give her, he seemed just as amused.

Friday arrived before she knew it and, for the first time, Rey decided to opt out of Friday happy hour -- she was all Han’d out and didn’t feel like watching Poe and Kaydel all over each other. Besides, she told herself, it would be nice to spend the evening at home catching up on tv.

She was looking over the takeout menus she kept on her fridge when her phone screen lit up, showing a new message from Kylo. Was answering so soon  _ too  _ eager? Rey found herself not really caring. 

_ I was just planning on staying in for the night. _

Kylo’s response was just as quick and Rey had to wonder if he felt just as anxious as she did to see her again. Her confirmation came in the reply,  _ Do you want to come over tonight? _

_ Yes. _ Rey answered and then set her phone down and rushed to her bedroom to fret over what to wear. It was stupid to care because she knew it wasn’t a date and she doubted that Kylo cared whether she came over in her current sweats or in an evening gown, but  _ Rey _ cared and that was unusual. She wasn’t even sure how to

After showering to get rid of the smell of engine grease, Rey pulled on a pair of jeans and one of her cuter tops and reached for her bag before remembering that Kylo had bought her clothes so that she didn’t need to bring anything over. She huffed at that and packed up the little watermelon purse that Rose had given her for her last birthday. She still felt uncomfortable about Kylo gifting her toys, but buying her clothes was too much, especially when she rarely bought new clothes for herself.

That didn’t stop her from being excited to finish her lego treehouse or to see what Kylo’s taste in clothes was like. As she shoved her phone into her purse and slid her toes into a pair of flip flops, she wondered if Kylo had even picked anything out himself. He seemed like the type to have an assistant do that kind of thing for him, though maybe he would draw the line at having someone buy shit for the twenty-one year old pretending to be his daughter.

She spent the subway ride to his apartment trying to resist the urge to text him, which turned out to be easy enough when Finn and Rose were bombarding her with texts about what she had been up to so far that summer. Rose was convinced that she had a boyfriend, while Finn insisted that meeting Han Solo was keeping her busy enough. Rey didn’t have anything to add -- there was no way she was telling them about Kylo. They would never believe her that it was an innocent enough arrangement and frankly, she didn’t feel like being talked down to like she was stupid.

Rey liked spending time with Kylo. She liked the way he looked at her and spoke to her and treated her -- like she was special and precious. Rose and Finn wouldn’t understand how much that meant to her and without a doubt they would accuse him of being a pervert.

As soon as she got to Kylo’s building, her phone was shoved into her back pocket and all thoughts of Rose and Finn were cast from her mind as she rode the elevator up to his penthouse, unable to contain her smile at the sight of him waiting as the elevator doors opened. “Hi.”

“Hey,” he ushered Rey into the apartment. “Did you eat already? I ordered pizza.”

Rey shook her head and set her purse down on the counter, blushing as her stomach growled. “Sounds good.” There was an awkward tension in the room that made Rey wonder if it would always be difficult to slip into their roleplay and she perched herself on a stool at his counter.

If he noticed the awkwardness, he said nothing directly about it as he walked towards her and took her hand. “How about a bath?” he suggested. “Dinner should be here by then. We can wear our pajamas and watch a movie.”

Rey let him take her hand and hoist her off of the stool and she nodded as he walked her towards her bedroom. As he pulled her into the room, he flicked on the light and made his way to the bathroom. “I got you some clothes. Pajamas too,” he nodded towards the closet as he pushed the plug into the tub and started the water.

Rey opened the closet, running her fingers along the dresses, and to see so many made Rey’s heart swell because she knew that it meant that Kylo wanted her around for a long time. She had people who cared about her, sure, but no one that she felt just wanted her around. 

Towards the back of the closet, several nightgowns were placed lovingly on hangers and Rey couldn’t help but note that they were all so pretty and feminine -- made from lace and silk and chiffon in all shades and each with their own peignoir. Rey’s heart ached with the notion that he’d hand-picked every last one for her. She’d never owned anything so pretty, she thought as she lifted one out by the hanger. It was a dainty little thing that Rey thought was sexy in an innocent way and it made her blush to think that this was what he wanted her to wear.

The bath water stopped, and Rey was reminded again that Kylo was just beyond the doors in the ensuite, preparing her bath. She quickly took the nightgown and peignoir, then turned to her dresser where, after checking high and low, she found that a crucial item seemed to be missing completely -- bras.

There was not one bra to be found in any drawer and Rey frowned down at the pajamas in her hands. What did it mean? Was it a careless mistake from a man who’s never had to buy a bra in his life? Or was it intentional? Did he not want her to wear a bra? She glanced over her shoulder to where he was drying his hands on a hand towel and tried to figure out if she should ask him or just put on her dirty bra.

“Ready,” he said, giving a soft smile as he held the door open for her.

Rey nodded and darted around him for the bathroom door. She’d figure it out after her bath, she decided as she began to close the bathroom door.

“Wait,” he called, his voice almost panicked. “Leave the door open?”

Rey blushed, remembering how he’d requested the same thing last week and she just gave him a quick nod, leaving the door open a crack and hiding out of view to undress. When she was sure he wasn’t peeking, she slipped into the tub and slid her shoulders below the bubbles, sighing and closing her eyes.

“Is it too hot?” he asked and Rey cracked open an eye to see him watching her from where he sat on the end of her bed.

“It’s perfect,” Rey assured him with a head shake.

He went back to looking at his phone and Rey took the opportunity to observe him, lifting her arms from the tub and resting them along the edge so she had somewhere to lean her chin. She couldn’t help but note again how handsome he was and when he lifted a hand to run it through his thick hair, her heart beat a little faster.

She knew that it wouldn’t do her any good to develop feelings for him. Part of her was so afraid it would ruin their dynamic, but then she was reminded of Kaydel and Poe and the fact that sex was a crucial part of their dynamic. She knew, however, that even if it didn’t ruin their dynamic, there was one other important factor: he was married. The feelings would never be returned and Rey would only get hurt in the end. 

Turning away from the door, she slid deeper into the bath until the tips of her hair were submerged in the water and tried to just relax -- after all it had been a long week and the next couple of days would be her only chance to really relax. She was looking forward to having Kylo take care of her.

As soon as her fingers began to wrinkle, Kylo stood from the bed. “Time to get out, Rey.”

She blushed and peeked her head over the bubbles, “Okay daddy.”

There was a beat of silence as Rey lifted herself out of the tub and grabbed a towel. “Do you need any help?” Kylo asked, his voice almost quiet.

Rey was glad that he couldn’t see her from where he was standing, but she shook her head anyway, fighting the blush spreading across her face and down her neck. She knew it was an innocent enough question -- one a parent would without a doubt ask their child. But for some reason, the idea of letting Kylo in to dry her off and put her in her nightgown was so erotic she found herself squeezing her thighs together and biting her bottom lip. She wanted it and that was a strange enough notion because she’d never wanted that kind of touch, but both her chest and her cunt ached with how much she wanted it. “N-no,” Rey’s voice shook as she finally answered. “I’m okay.”

“I’m going to wait for the pizza then, okay?”

“Okay,” Rey answered and when the door shut, she finally relaxed and began drying off. When she was dry, she lifted her bra from the floor and put it on, deciding it was best to make sure she was truly decent and draw the line before she let herself get carried away in her fantasies. She took the nightgown off the hanger and slid it on over her head, but when she looked down, the cut of the gown exposed the cups of her dirty, worn out bra. With a grimace, she pulled it off and balled it up with her dirty clothes. She couldn’t very well let him see her grody bra.

She quickly pulled on her peignoir, deciding that it would be better to just spend the night trying to hide the fact that she wasn’t wearing a bra. Her chest was small enough that he probably wouldn’t even notice. 

When she left the bathroom, she noticed that Kylo had placed a pair of fuzzy slippers in the doorway and she couldn’t help but smile and wonder if he knew how much these little things would mean to her. Was this what it felt like to have someone truly care? She wondered as she padded her way to the living room.

The first thing she noticed was that Kylo had set up plates and silverware at the little coffee table in the living room. “Pizza’s here,” he smiled when he noticed her and nodded down at the floor. Rey sat down, folding her legs underneath her and pulling her peignoir tightly around her front.

He sat down next to her, though he had a considerably larger amount of trouble finding room for his long legs than she did. When he was finally comfortable, he lifted the lid of the pizza box and Rey couldn’t help but snort.

“What?” he asked, glancing at her from the corner of his eye as he placed a piece on her plate.

“Of course you ordered fancy pizza,” she teased, nodding towards the brick-oven baked margherita pie.

“It’s not fancy,” he argued. “It’s  _ real _ pizza.”

She ignored the silverware and picked up her piece, taking a big bite and with her mouth full, added, “It tastes fancy.” 

As she watched him cut his pizza with a knife and fork, she wanted nothing more than to tease him, but the meticulous way he was eating his pizza was so endearing. Her entire life had been rooted in chaos. She was messy and careless and a little wild. Somehow, despite that, Rey liked how orderly and controlled he was -- to the point that watching him eat pizza this way did something delicious to her insides. 

He exuded confidence and discipline, things that Rey lacked but so desperately wanted. As she took another huge bite of pizza, she mused that they were almost like two halves of a whole and again she was reminded that as little as she knew of Kylo’s reasons for wanting her around, she felt that maybe he needed her the way she needed him.

Their meal was eaten in silence -- at some point Kylo had turned on a nature program and Rey had been amused to see him watch the screen so intently. When dinner was finished, Kylo insisted on cleaning up by himself so Rey made herself comfortable on the couch, stretching out and laying her head on one of the suede throw pillows. Wildlife documentaries weren’t really her thing, but Rey couldn’t find it in her heart to change it when it seemed that Kylo was enjoying it so much. When he finally rejoined her, she was already half asleep, but still bent her legs, curling them towards her chest to make room for him. 

“You can use my lap,” Kylo offered once he sat down, grabbing her ankles and pulling her legs into his lap.

Rey squeaked at the manhandling and it was an embarrassing realization that not only had a man never touched her legs but that she’d had such a vocal response to it. Kylo did nothing but chuckle and tickle the bottom of a foot, causing Rey to squirm.

“Are you ticklish?” he asked playfully.

“Yes,” Rey said, yanking her foot away with a pout. The struggle of it caused her nightgown to ride up, but she couldn’t find a lady-like way to readjust it so she ignored it and settled back down into her spot

“Do you want me to turn the channel?”

Rey shook her head, “We can watch this.”

“You look bored,” he commented, and the hands that were tickling her feet were now kneading the bottoms.

Rey swore she felt shocks of electricity shoot up her legs starting at where his fingers were working at the knots on the bottoms of her feet, and she physically had to bite back a moan. “More bored than you were when I made you watch cooking shows?”

He said nothing but gave her a soft grin, turning his attention back to the television. The program really was boring and Rey had a hard time caring about some kind of bird in the Galapagos, but if it made Kylo happy, she would gladly watch it. Or at least try to, because the monotonous narration kept making her eyes droop.

The only thing that kept her away was Kylo’s fingers. They’d started out kneading the bottoms of her feet and that had felt heavenly enough, but as he grew more absorbed in his television program, his touches turned feather light -- the tips of his fingers ghosting over her ankle bones, his hands sliding soothingly up and down her calf. It was an odd mix of calming and arousing, and Rey had to squash down that second feeling and scold herself for being so touch-starved that something so simple was setting her on fire.

When his fingers finally went higher, ghosting over her knee, the tips slid under the hem of her tangled nightgown and Rey watched him from behind her eyelashes. His eyes were still glued to the tv, he had no idea what he was doing, or at least she told herself as much. She had no reason to feel so aroused. She shifted on the couch, rearranging herself so that perhaps he would look over and notice his hand crawling up her nightgown -- maybe he’d grow flustered and apologize or scramble away.

He did neither of those things, not even sparing a glance as her shifting brought his hand to rest on her inner thigh. Her legs parted on their own, and Rey rolled onto her back, keeping her eyes closed as his hand crept higher. It was no longer just his fingertips under her nightie, but his entire hand now, splayed along her inner thigh and creeping higher, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

There was a thump in the hallway and both Rey and Kylo jumped to opposite sides of the couch. She  _ knew _ that if anyone had walked in on what had just happened, it would have been too incriminating to be deemed innocent. Even if he hadn’t done anything intentionally, her position had been too provocative.

Her face was redder than it had ever been before and Kylo shot off the couch. “Go get ready for bed, Rey.”

She nodded and let him corral her into her bedroom -- just in time to see Kylo’s bedroom door swing open. Kylo quickly shut the door behind her, but she could hear the muffled voices as Kylo spoke to his wife.

Rey pulled off her peignoir and laid it across the foot of the bed before crawling under the covers, feeling ashamed for having let herself get so caught up in Kylo’s caresses. He’d only meant to soothe her and she’d turned it into something disgusting and pathetic. “Stupid,” she cursed herself and pulled the blanket up over her head. There was something humiliating in the knowledge that she was taking pleasure in something meant to be nurturing.

She squeezed her eyes shut, feeling frustrated that she wasn’t able to relax into sleep the way she almost had a half dozen times on the sofa. Without even thinking, her hand slid under her nightgown, mimicking the way Kylo’s had touched her thighs.

She drew in a stuttering breath as her fingers slid higher. Her entire body felt too alive from Kylo’s touch, and while Rey was not a frequent masturbator -- she found it hard to become aroused enough to climax -- just the memory of Kylo’s hands were making her panties sticky and damp.

Rey lifted her hips, sliding her panties down her legs and kicking them off. Without pretense, she slid her fingers along the crease of her vulva. Her thighs fell open as she closed her eyes and imagined it was Kylo’s thick finger, tracing her sex. She knew he would be confident in his actions and decidedly less delicate, so she found the sensitive bud of her clit and stroked it roughly. “Mmm,” she bit her lip to keep from crying out. 

Her thighs were sticky with her desire and when her fingers slid through her slippery folds, she had to bite back another moan. She thought about Kylo, imagined that this was what would have happened on the sofa if they hadn’t been interrupted.

She imagined him pulling her panties down her legs and parting her thighs with his huge hands. Maybe he would spend time just looking at her, as fascinated by her body as he had been by the stupid Galapagos birds. He’d take his time touching her, working her up until she was squirming before finally pressing a finger against her opening.

Rey swore stars exploded behind her eyes as her fingertip dipped inside and she imagined that Kylo would be so gentle with her then, and her finger sunk in up to the first knuckle. Kylo’s fingers were so much bigger -- everything about him was bigger and Rey knew that he would take such good care of her.

She touched herself how she never had before, in ways that she imagined Kylo would -- drawing aggressively tight circles against her clit. She imagined him whispering encouraging words to her, and Rey’s hips jerked from the bed as she came harder than she ever had before. It was all over embarrassingly fast and as Rey tried to catch her breath she remembered all the frustratingly fruitless attempts she’d made in the past.

After pulling her nightgown down, she rolled onto her stomach and closed her eyes, refusing to think about what she’d just done. Her body was sated and her mind was tired, and finally she felt that she could catch sleep.

Rey was roused from her sleep -- disoriented enough that she wasn’t sure whether she’d been sleeping at all -- as her door opened. The room was dark, but she knew it was Kylo when he sat down on her bed and twisted a lock of her hair around his finger. Leaning down, he kissed the crown of her head and Rey rolled onto her side to look up at him.

“I didn’t mean to wake you, baby,” he said softly, brushing his finger along her cheek.

“It’s okay,” Rey whispered back, pulling her hand out from under the covers to take his hand.

“I wanted to see you,” he told her, lifting her hand to his lips and kissing the back of it.

Too late to realize it was the hand she’d used to get herself off, she didn’t pull it away in time to see his eyes darken. “Rey,” he said, his voice so low and soft she almost didn’t hear it.

She tried to pull her hand away, but his grip tightened and she watched in horror as he brought the tips of her fingers to his nose and inhaled. She thought she would definitely die of embarrassment at having been caught and she scrambled to think of an explanation that wouldn’t sound completely deranged.

Her brain was still working on what to say as he brought her fingers to his lips and kissed the tips gently -- not missing the way the rough texture of his tongue slid across her fingertips. “Naughty girl,” he whispered, dropping her hand and licking his lips.

“I can explain,” Rey spluttered, but Kylo was already standing. She had no idea what had just happened. Was he disgusted with her?

“Goodnight, Rey.”

He was gone from her room before she could explain herself and part of her was so humiliated that she was seriously considering leaving before the morning. But there was another part of her, so intrigued and confused by Kylo that she couldn’t even think straight. He knew what she’d done, and if that wasn’t embarrassing enough he’d  _ tasted _ what she’d done.

What the actual hell.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that it's been so long since I've updated this! I promise to be better about it from here on out. I've posted my update schedule on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/jeeaysee0925) so follow me if you want to know when I plan on updating this fic (hint: it's very soon!)
> 
> I really appreciate anyone still reading this!


	5. Chapter 5

When Rey woke the next morning, she was hit full force with the shame of what she’d done the night before and embarrassment that she’d been caught. Her own saving grace was that Kylo had no idea that she’d been thinking about him as she’d touched herself. Was it weird that she was masturbating in his house? Yes. But she was a young woman with needs and she shouldn’t have to feel ashamed for satisfying those needs.

Except that she truly did. She’d tossed and turned for over an hour once Kylo had left and cursed herself half a million times in that span for fantasizing about a married man whose wife was just down the hall. She assumed that Kylo loved his wife and he must have thought her actions were weird and disgusting.

She could hear him moving around in the kitchen and was filled with dread at the knowledge that she’d missed out on her own chance to sneak out of the apartment. Rey buried her face against her pillow, willing the earth to just open up and swallow her whole. There was no way she could go out there and face Kylo.

What if kicked her out? Or worse, what if he wanted to  _ talk  _ about it? A long groan escaped her lips and she lifted the covers over her head, trying to hide.

She froze when she heard her door open and knew it was Kylo from his heavy footsteps. “Rey. Breakfast is ready.” He paused next to the bed and lifted the covers off of her head. “Morning,” he smirked down at her.

“Morning,” Rey mumbled in returned, smoothing down the hairs standing on end from the static electricity.

He waited for her to pull herself out of bed and Rey was eternally grateful that he was acting normal -- so normal, in fact, that part of her questioned what happened the night before. Maybe he hadn’t realized what she’d been doing at all. 

She followed him to the dining room and let him push her chair in for her once she was seated. In front of her was a belgian waffle covered in strawberries and whipped cream and Rey’s mouth watered at the sight. She’d been a broke student for so long that breakfast usually consisted of a piece of buttered toast.

  
Kylo seemed to notice the way she was looking at the plate almost reverently and he chuckled, “Eat. I can make you another one if you want.”

Rey immediately got to work, cutting into her waffle and lifting a huge piece into her mouth, humming in delight as she chewed. All earlier thoughts of her humiliation were forgotten as she ate her waffle like there was no tomorrow and when her plate was clean, she finally noticed that Kylo was watching her with amusement twinkling in his eyes.

“You have a sweet-tooth, don’t you, sweetheart?” he chuckled. He reached over and wiped the whipped cream from the corner of her mouth. “So messy,” he chided.

Rey blushed, feeling like a pig for eating so fast. And she hadn’t even tried to make conversation as she ate.

“Do you want more?” he asked, standing up and taking her plate.

She shook her head, not wanting to seem like the glutton that she was. Yes, she was supposed to behave like a child, but she didn’t need to be disgusting.

“What about just more strawberries and whipped cream then?” 

“Okay,” she agreed, wondering if he had some kind of uncanny ability to know exactly what she wanted. He’d make a good dad, she realized. When he returned with her plate, which was covered in fresh strawberries and whipped cream, Rey made a concentrated effort to be a little less ravenous in her eating.

She watched as Kylo cut his waffle with knife and fork, lifting a perfect square covered in just the right amount of strawberry and cream to his mouth, and wondered how everything about him just seemed so perfect. As soon as he caught her watching him, she turned her focus back to her plate, stabbing a strawberry with her fork and dragging it through the melting whipped cream.

When Rey finished her strawberries, she dragged her fingers through the mess of juices and cream and sucked it from her fingers until her plate was clean. She’s realized too late that he’d been watching her in fascination as she’d cleaned her plate and her face turned red. “I can do the dishes,” she offered, standing to clear the table.

“I’ll get it,” Kylo stood and took the plates, but not before giving her a smirk and adding, “my messy little girl.”

Rey’s stomach fluttered at his words, at being referred to as his girl, and nodded. If she didn’t keep her mind out of the gutter, she’d have an embarrassing repeat of last night. She should be thanking the stars that he’d decided not to kick her out and just pretend it had never happened and she was  _ still _ lusting after him.

“Go get dressed,” he told her firmly and walked to the kitchen carrying the dishes.

*****

As soon as Kylo was in the kitchen and out of Rey’s sight, he exhaled loudly and leaned against the counter, trying to get a hold of himself. He wondered if Rey had any idea what she was doing to him.

At first, watching her eat had just been amusing -- she was sloppy and greedy. It should have been disgusting to someone like him. He craved order and discipline in every aspect of his life and in comes Rey, bubbly and wild, and he suddenly finds himself unable to think about anything but her.

Her voraciousness was endearing and he hadn’t been able to stop watching her as she gorged herself on strawberries and whipped cream. And when she’d started using her fingers to lick and suck every last morsel, he’d almost lost it. He’d wondered if she’d done it intentionally, but she was too innocent to be so calculating.

Maybe that was a part of why she appealed to him so much. In his day to day life, he surrounded himself with people who were conniving and fought tooth and nail to watch others fail. 

Rey was seductive without even trying. That was why he’d been unable to keep his hands off of her on the couch. He’d tried so hard but she kept letting that damned nightie ride up every time she stretched, her little feet flexing on his lap and her back arching off the couch cushions. She was seducing him without even knowing it. Before he knew it, his hands had been treading into dangerous territory.

If Caroline hadn’t started having a fit, he wouldn’t have stopped. He’d sworn to keep it platonic and he couldn’t even go two weeks before he broke his promise.

After he got Caroline settled, Kylo went to Rey’s room with the intention of apologizing for getting so carried away. He’d planned to beg her for forgiveness, but then he’d caught the scent on her fingers and he  _ knew _ that it wasn’t just him. He hadn’t been able to resist taking a taste.

Rey wanted him too and she was so  _ sweet. _

Kylo groaned and dropped the dishes into the sink. He was already half-hard just thinking about her smell and taste. As soon as he’d left her room, he’d masturbated furiously in the shower. Kylo had almost started to believe there was something wrong with his dick, it had been so long since he’d gotten an erection.

But just the passing thought of bubbly little Rey, touching her perfect little cunt for him had him hard enough that he needed to reach down and readjust himself in his pants.

He never would have invited Rey into his home or his life if not for the constant pressure from Snoke to produce an heir. He’d married Caroline, not for love, but to have a familial connection to the man that had been his mentor. Snoke’s daughter had been beautiful back then and perhaps a little troubled.

But it wasn’t a happy marriage, and that much was clear to Kylo now. He still didn’t love her and now she only disgusted him. That coupled with an intense fear of being incapable as a father, had brought Rey to his doorstep.

He’d thought, foolishly, that he could build his confidence as a father. Perhaps he could right some wrongs and prove to himself that he could be gentle and patient and present as a parent -- things he’d never learned from his own father. And what better way to learn these things than with a safe partner who he had a mutual understanding with?

Except he hadn’t counted on Rey being so beautiful or sweet or funny. He hadn’t planned on wanting to know her more or make her smile. There was a lot he hadn’t planned on and as much as Rey was throwing a wrench in his plans, he couldn’t help the draw he felt towards her.

He wanted Rey more than anything he’d wanted in a long time.

*****

Rey went to her room and sat on the corner of her bed, taking a few much needed breaths. She wasn’t sure what was wrong with her. She’d felt longing before, but it had never been directed at a specific person. More often than not her longing was just to be  _ able  _ to be held or touched or kissed. It was triggered by watching other couples or seeing a sappy romance movie.

The longing she felt now was a different kind, one that Rey didn’t even know she was capable of feeling. She didn’t just want to be able to have a normal relationship. She wanted  _ Kylo. _ No longer were her desires linked to some faceless, nameless humanoid: she longed to be held and kissed and touched by  _ Kylo _ .

Part of Rey was thrilled -- this was exactly what she’d wanted when she’d reached out to Kylo. Her only hope was that she would be ready for real human touch that didn’t make her flinch away. But a bigger part of her was horrified because the one person she’d ever wanted was unavailable. He had a wife.

He didn’t want her that way. No one had ever  _ really _ wanted her anyway, so she should be used to the feeling. And yet, that was no consolation. Rey felt like crying, but she couldn’t. Not here where Kylo could catch her.

  
She blinked back the tears in her eyes, all the while telling herself how stupid she was for getting sad over a situation she never should have let happen. She had no right to be upset when she’d been adamant about their arrangement staying strictly platonic.She rubbed at her eyes, trying to rid them of the tears but only managed to make them leak from the corners of her eyes faster. 

Needing a distraction, she shot up from the bed and crossed to the closet, pulling a dress and matching cardigan out. She undressed quickly and pulled the dress on along with a clean pair of panties, just in time for Kylo to come in.

“Do you want to work on the LEGO treehouse?” he asked but came to a stop when he noticed her face. “Rey?”

“Uh, sure,” she said, trying to sound cheery as she wiped her cheeks.

“What’s wrong?” he asked and she wanted to curse him for not just letting it go.

“Nothing.”

“Come here,” he said, sitting on her bed and holding his arms out.

Rey shuffled over and stood awkwardly in front of him, unsure what he wanted from her until he pulled her down onto his lap. “What’s wrong?” he tried again, brushing his fingers through her hair.

She shrugged. There was no way she could tell him that she was upset because she couldn’t have him. That was perhaps even more embarrassing than having been caught maturbating.

“Hmm,” Kylo hummed thoughtfully and began braiding her hair into twin pigtails.

Rey found herself leaning into his touch, despite her hesitation at getting too close. It felt nice being cared for in such a way. She’d never had a mother to fix her hair for her and there was a part of her that was too greedy for it to turn him away, even if it was in both of their best interests.

When he finished, he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her further up his lap until she had nowhere to put her arms but around his neck. “Why were you crying?”

“I wasn’t,” Rey lied with a stubborn shake of her head.

“Are you upset with me?” he asked carefully, his eyes searching hers.

Rey looked away, unable to deny that he was the source behind her tears. She felt so pathetic as her eyes welled up again.

“Sweetheart, look at me.” When she refused, he took her face in his hands and turned it to look at him. He clicked his tongue in disapproval of her tears and kissed her cheek. Then her nose. And finally a soft kiss against her lips and as chaste as it was, Rey found her fingers tightening on the collar of his shirt and a soft sigh escaping her lips.

When he pulled away, he brushed the tears from her cheeks and kissed her forehead for good measure. His hands fell from her waist to her hips and he asked her softly, “What can I do to make it better?”

Rey put her head on his shoulder, too embarrassed by all of the affection to look at him directly as she answered, “Just hold me.”

He kissed the top of her head, one hand stroking her hip as the other rubbed up and down her back soothingly. Rey couldn’t decide if she was aroused or satiated. She felt happy though, in his arms like this -- safe and taken care of. After a few minutes of cuddling, she mumbled against his neck, “I’m okay, now, daddy.”

She thought she felt him shiver, but before she had a chance to examine that further, he stood and placed her on feet on the ground. “LEGO house?” she asked, as she picked up the cardigan from the floor and put it on, leading him out of the room.

Relief washed through her when again, Kylo didn’t mention her tears again. She seated herself on the hardwood floor and began to connect pieces of LEGO together, more than happy to lose herself in the project for a few hours.

*****

As they worked on the treehouse, time seemed to get away from them. They’d paused briefly in the afternoon for lunch and in the early evening, Kylo had turned the tv to some nature documentary for background noise. By the time they snapped in the final pieces, it was going on eight o’clock.

“I forgot about dinner. You must be starving,” Kylo jumped up from his spot.

Rey had lost track of time too, but the mention of food had her stomach growling. He snickered at her body’s response and stood up. “I’ll go fix something.”

She nodded, “I’m going to take a bath.”

“Uh, how about a shower?” he suggested and when she looked at him curiously he said, “I’ll have dinner done really fast.”

“Sure,” she agreed and padded to her bedroom, grabbing another nightgown on her way to the bathroom. Once she got to the shower, she took the braids out of her hair with regret and climbed in.

It felt good to shower and Kylo had stocked her bathroom with plenty of fancy products, so even though he’d told her to shower quickly, she spent a long time primping before toweling off and putting on her pajamas. When she met Kylo in the dining room, she was running her fingers through her damp hair as he set the table. She wrinkled her nose at the smell of fish and took her seat.

“It’s good for you,” Kylo said, eyeing her reaction.

“What is it?” she asked, picking up her fork and poking it.

“Salmon meuniere,” he told her as he picked up his own fork and began to eat.

Rey wrinkled her nose. Fancy people food. Fish and asparagus. 

“You had dessert for breakfast. You need to eat something good for you,” he scolded.

“Whatever happened to good old fashioned fish sticks?” she mumbled under her breath as she took a bite. And froze.

“Good, right?” he smirked.

“Yeah,” she admitted. “I’ve never had salmon before.”

“Never?”

Rey shook her head, “It's expensive.” Broke college students couldn’t afford fancy seafood. 

“I’ll make it for you again. Anything you want,” he told her, and she could tell by his smile that he was pleased she liked the food so much.

Well, she liked the fish anyway. The asparagus was as disgusting as it looked and she only took the three bites that she promised Kylo she would take before pushing the plate away.

This time, he let her dry the dishes as he washed and when everything was all cleaned up, they sat down on the couch together. She was tired -- she hadn’t slept well and they’d been putting together the LEGO treehouse all day -- but she didn’t want to miss out on her last few hours with Kylo. In the morning, she’d have to go home and it would be a whole week until she saw him again.

Which meant a whole week without his touches. “Can you do my hair again?” she asked, wanting to soak up as much of his attention as she could before she had to go.

“Mmhmm. Come here,” he spread his legs and patted the triangle of couch cushion between them. She sat awkwardly perched on the edge of the sofa, between his thighs, until he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her back against his chest.

She made a squeak of protest but then his hands were in her hair, massaging her scalp and twisting her hair into some kind of intricate braid. She relaxed, leaning her head down as he worked his magic and produced a hair tie from thin air to hold it in place. When he was done, he lifted her by the hips and set her on his thigh so that he could admire his handiwork.

“Pretty,” he told her and kissed her cheek.

Rey felt warm all over and knew this was what it felt like to be cherished. Even if he didn’t return her feelings, at least she could pretend he did in moments like this.

“You look like an angel in this,” he said, touching the gauzy fabric of her nightgown.

Unmistakably, his eyes dropped to her collarbone and then dipped lower to her chest. Her heart raced under his gaze and her body responded to his attention all on its own and she shivered as she felt her nipple harden.

Kylo licked his lips and his eyes met hers, “You’re not wearing a bra.”

She shook her head with a blush, “I can put one on.” She made to stand, but he held her in place and looked at her hungrily.

“What if I don’t want you to?”

The words made Rey’s heart race and she felt a glimmer of hope that it meant he returned her feelings -- or at the very least, the attraction. “Oh.”

He maneuvered her on his lap so that she was straddling his thigh and her arms hung limp at the side as she watched his gaze return to her chest. With a tentative touch, he raised his hand and brushed his pointer finger over her nipple.

Rey’s hips jerked and she felt like she’d been electrocuted with how strongly her body reacted to the simple touch.

“So sensitive,” Kylo cooed and repeated the motion, flicking his finger back and forth across the hardened peak as it strained against the fabric. “Nobody has ever touched you like this before, have they, sweetheart?”

Rey’s eyes were closed, partly in embarrassment and partly because it felt so good, she  _ couldn’t _ keep them open. She shook her head and her hands blindly reached up to clutch his shoulders.

“Just me?” he asked gently, moving his hand to her other breast, this time taking the nipple between two fingers and tugging gently.

Rey cried out and lifted her hips from his thigh. She was embarrassingly wet and didn’t want to make a mess on his pants.

He let go of her nipple and grabbed her hips, pulling her back down so she was seated against his thigh. “Just me?” he asked again.

Rey nodded and panted, “Just you, daddy.”

He rewarded her answer by dipping his head and taking a nipple into his mouth, sucking at it through the fabric. 

Rey’s head was swimming and her body was singing with pleasure -- the combination of the rough fabric, Kylo’s hot mouth and the persistent sucking had her throwing her head back and gasping for air.

He released the left nipple and grabbed her hips, sliding her against his thigh. Rey cried out as the friction against her clit made her toes curl and her forehead fell against his shoulder. “Good girl,” Kylo cooed, loosening his grip on her hips as she began to move them on her own.

She was too lost in the pleasure to think about what this all meant. Kylo’s hands crept up the back of her nightgown, rubbing her back encouragingly as her hips jerked against the hard muscle of his thigh.

She tilted her hips, finding just the right angle and began humping his thigh in earnest. She’d tried this with a pillow, under Rose’s recommendation, but had apparently never been doing it right. Nothing had ever felt as good as this.

“That’s my good girl,” Kylo whispered, his hands dropping back down to her hips, pressing down on her for more friction. “You’re so wet.”

Rey blushed, but she wasn’t sure if it was from embarrassment or the pleasure at his praises. Her hips started to move faster as she felt her climax approach, building and building, and the sounds that were coming out of her mouth -- little pants and gasps and squeaks were becoming embarrassingly loud.

He hooked one finger under her chin and kissed her mouth, this time she felt the brush of his tongue against hers when she’d opened to gasp. She started to shutter and Kylo broke the kiss to stroke her hair and sigh, “It’s okay, sweetheart. You can come on daddy.”

Rey cried out, her forehead dropping onto his shoulder and her arms clinging as her entire body quaked. When she collapsed against him, Kylo took her into his arm, curling her up in his arms and kissed her forehead. The post-orgasmic bliss kept her from thinking too deeply about the ramifications of what they’d done or what any of it meant and after a few moments, Kylo stood from the couch and carried Rey, bridal-style, to her bedroom.

He placed her on the bed carefully, like she was the most precious possession he owned and swaddled her in the blankets. “Goodnight, sweetheart.”

The last thing Rey remembered before falling asleep was the soft kiss he placed on her lips before leaving the room.

*****

  
  



	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://ibb.co/NVsQQhb)

After tucking Rey into bed, Kylo stepped into the hallway and let out a deep breath. He didn’t realize, until he lifted a shaky hand through his hair, how he had been holding himself back from pouncing Rey. As he’d carried her, he’d struggled internally against the urge to crawl into bed with her and had to remember the promise he’d already broken -- to keep things between them platonic.

He wanted Rey more than he’d wanted anything in years and now that he’d had a taste, he wanted even more of her. Things were more complicated than just acting on his own base desires. Rey was clearly more inexperienced than he was -- it made sense since she had come to him with the desire to be touched and held. He needed to be certain that she wanted him in return and that she knew what she was getting herself into.

First things first, he needed to deal with his own arousal. As he opened his bedroom door, careful to keep from waking his wife, he unbuckled his belt and pulled it through the loops before dropping it to the floor. He quickly made his way across the room to the ensuite bathroom and closed the door.

As he unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, he turned on the shower to drown out any noise -- not that Caroline would awaken from her drunken stupor to care about his late night jerk-off session. Quickly, he stripped down to nothing and instead of tossing his pants into the laundry hamper as he would usually do, he picked them up in order to examine the wet stain that Rey had left on the thigh.

He groaned as he held it to his nose, inhaling deeply, and remembered all of the sweet little gasps and pants she had made as she rubbed her little cunt against him. God, everything about Rey was intoxicating -- the way she smelled, the noises she made, her trembling thighs as she brought herself to release with his body -- and as Kylo’s tongue darted out to taste the mess she’d made, he realized the way she tasted was just as sweet as everything else.

He wrapped a hand around the base of his cock, giving it a squeeze to stave off his body’s response to the Rey sensory overload he was experiencing. He had no idea that one of his most thrilling erotic experiences would come from letting a woman hump his leg until she came, but then a lot of things were surprising where Rey was involved.

“Rey,” the name tumbled from his lips as he started stroking, hard and fast -- he needed release -- and he imagined what it would have been like if he’d just pulled his cock out there on the couch, hauling Rey onto his lap. It would have been so easy to just push her sticky panties to the side and bury himself inside of her. He imagined how tight and wet and warm she would feel wrapped around him and he’d teach her how to ride cock like a good little girl.

That thought spurred him on and he slapped one hand against the wall as he furiously jerked himself off to the thought of her little gasps each time he’d slide home inside of her and when her orgasm took hold and she could no longer bounce, he would grab her little hips and move her over him like a ragdoll until he filled her with his cum.

Kylo bit his arm to keep from crying out as his own release splattered against the shower wall in a powerful orgasm and he knew that if the thought of having Rey brought him this much pleasure, the real thing might actually kill him.

*****

Rey woke the next morning feeling incredibly well-rested and it wasn’t until she arched her back, stretching out the length of her body, arms over head and toes curled, that she felt the lingering stickiness between her thighs and remembered what had happened the night before. She bit her lip and rolled over onto her stomach to bury her face in her pillow and drown out the noise of her half-embarrassed, half-ecstatic squeal.

She could no longer deny that the attraction that she felt towards Kylo was one-sided. She could remember the feel of his large hands on her waist and his lips on her breasts and the thoughts alone were only making her thighs feel stickier. He’d touched her and kissed her and helped her get-off.

She’d never done anything with a boy before and her first sexual experience with a man had her feeling so giddy that she didn’t immediately think about the consequences of what they’d done. In the moment, she could only think about how she wanted to do it again. There had been a part of her that was afraid she’d never get to experience these things. She shrank away from hugs and affection, and yet when Kylo held her, everything just happened so organically.

She knew that it was embarrassing that she’d dry-humped his leg to orgasm and she’d never have the guts to tell anyone else, but she also thought it was hot, the way he’d held her hips and guided her movement. Had he liked it too? Rey wondered.

There was a soft knock on her door to interrupt her thoughts and Kylo poked his head in, smiling softly when he saw that she was awake, “Time for breakfast, sweetheart.”

Rey nodded, suddenly feeling shy, and lifted the blanket to her chin. “Okay.”

“Are you being shy this morning?” he teased.

“No,” Rey shook her head but her blush gave her away. She couldn’t help feeling shy when the unspoken thoughts of what they’d done were still tumbling around in her head. She really liked Kylo, she could admit that now, and yet she didn’t really have any idea how he felt about her.

“Hurry up before breakfast gets cold.” He shut the door as he left the room and Rey scrambled out of bed to get dressed.

She reached for the first dress dressed and slipped it on, without a bra in hopes that Kylo would notice and after changing into a clean pair of panties, she hurried from the room to meet him at the table. “Good morning,” she said softly as she sat down in her designated chair.

Kylo was reading a newspaper, but he set it aside once she sat down to focus his full attention on her, “Did you sleep well?”

Rey nodded. She’d slept better than she could remember thanks to Kylo’s helping hands. She blushed at that thought and wondered if they’d talk about it.

“Good,” he said, leaning his chin on his fist as he watched Rey eat the omelette he’d made. 

Once she’d finished every bite, she used her finger to wipe up the leftover grease from the melted cheese and sucked it into her mouth. Tonight, she’d be back to her cheap meals of ramen and peanut butter sandwiches, so she wanted to savor every last bite of Kylo’s rich food. She didn’t realize until after she’d released her finger with a pop just how closely he’d been watching her.

“Come here,” he uttered in a husky voice, pushing his chair back to make room on his lap for Rey.

Her heart was beating fast as she stood and walked the few steps to where he was sitting, unsure of what he wanted. Luckily, he took charge of the situation and pulled her onto his lap, wrapping his arms around her waist and hauling her back to his chest. “Such a sloppy girl, Rey.”

“Sorry,” she squeaked, shifting as he played with the hem of her dress. She looked down, watching as he pulled it higher up her thighs.

“You forgot a bra again, didn’t you?” he asked, resting his chin on her shoulder. 

“Yes,” she croaked.

“Yes what?” he asked, still hiking her dress up until her panties were visible. She could hear Kylo’s intake of breath at the sight and for the first time she realized that perhaps she had some power over him too.

“Yes, daddy,” she said, sounding almost smug until his hands continued sliding up underneath her dress, over her ribs.

“Are you teasing daddy?” he asked, his fingers skimming the underside of her breasts.

She shook her head against the accusation, rubbing her thighs together as her nipples hardened in anticipation of what he would do to her. 

“I think you are, sweetheart” he continued, and finally his hands cupped her breasts. “You want me to play with you, don’t you?” 

What was the point in denying that she wanted this? This time she nodded and murmured, “Yes,” arching her back and pushing her breasts into his palms.

He pulled his hands away, sliding them out of her dress and pulling it back down her thighs, much to Rey’s disappointment. “You’ll have to be a good girl if you want to play.”

Rey wanted to argue that she was being good. She’d woken up and gotten dressed when he’d asked and she’d finished every last bite of her breakfast. She got as far as opening her mouth to argue when his cellphone rang and he moved her from his lap to stand up and take the call.

She watched as he left the room and tried not to pout. It wasn’t like her to be so moody -- she was used to being on the bottom of the list of priorities for people, and yet she couldn’t fight the heavy disappointment that settled into the pit of her stomach as she watched Kylo’s back while he retreated down the hall.

There was an internal struggle, not just with the aching disappointment, but a bitter jealousy crept up too and Rey was reminded for the first time since last night that Kylo wasn’t hers. He was married and while it was pretty clear to her now that Kylo was not as dedicated to her as Rey had originally believed, he also hadn’t divorced her.

Rey knew that it was wrong to want him so much, not just his touch but also his attention and adoration and desire, but she could not help the way she felt. The existence of his wife meant that maybe she’d go to hell for it, but it was hard to care when he was the only man who made her feel these things she was experiencing for the first time.

When Kylo finally re-emerged from what she assumed was his bedroom, he had a serious look on his face. “I have to go to a meeting today. I’ll walk you to the train station.”

If Rey had thought that she felt disappointed when he’d pushed her off of his lap, that disappointment was tenfold at the thought of losing out on her last few hours with Kylo. She’d hoped that even if they didn’t do anything sexual, at least they could cuddle or work on a new LEGO set before going home. The thought of having to wait almost another full week before she had a chance to see him again was torture. But she didn’t want to be clingy or needy so she did her best to keep from pouting as she stood up and said, “Okay.”

She went to move past him to her bedroom to collect all of her things, but Kylo grabbed her arm. “Hey,” he said softly, lifting her chin to look at him. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

Rey’s heart fluttered and she shook her head, “It’s okay. I’ll see you next weekend, right?”

Kylo nodded, “Of course.” He leaned down and kissed her forehead. “You can text me whenever you want too. Or call me at night.”

“Okay,” she agreed, still trying not to show her disappointment as Kylo let go of her arm and she retreated to her bedroom, quickly packing her things.

  
When Rey got back to the living room, Kylo had changed into a suit and Rey found it hard not to admire how hot he looked. He’d been wearing a suit the first time they’d met and of course, Rey had found him attractive then, but she could only notice how broad his shoulders were and how thick his thighs were now that she’d had one wedged between her own. She wanted to pull him to the couch and unbutton that starched white shirt and…

“Ready to go?” he asked, holding out his hand.

Rey nodded with a blush and hurried to his side, taking his huge hand in her much smaller one, and let him lead her from the apartment. “Do you usually work Sundays?”

“Sometimes,” Kylo acknowledged, “I’m sorry again, Rey. I thought we’d have a little bit more time today.”

“It’s fine,” Rey waved him off as they stepped out of the elevator and into the lobby of his building. “Do you work nearby?”

“Just a few blocks down, so I have time to walk you to the train station.” He didn’t drop her hand as they walked from the building, so Rey took a step closer, wrapping her free arm around his bicep and leaning against him as they walked.

*****

Armitage Hux was used to playing second fiddle to Kylo Ren. They’d joined the company at the same time and yet Ren had managed to impress Snoke every step of the way. No matter what Hux did, Kylo was one step ahead of him and Hux had thought it was all over when Snoke announced that Kylo Ren would be marrying his daughter. 

Snoke could pretend that Kylo was the son he never had, but Hux saw it for what it was: Ren had played dirty in order to get what he wanted and managed to secure his future in the company by marrying the CEO’s daughter. It was genius, really, and Hux was almost disappointed that he hadn’t thought of it first -- until the messy incident last year.

And because of that incident, Ren was slowly falling out of Snoke’s good graces and Hux was slowly planning to turn the tide in his favor through hard work and dedication. He didn’t need to play dirty to win. 

Unless, of course, the opportunity to play dirty just happened to land in his lap. 

So when he saw Ren on his way to the office, he couldn’t help the gleeful smile from spreading across his face. Because Kylo Ren was strolling down the street, holding some woman’s hand. A woman that was not Caroline Snoke.

He pulled out his phone, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible, as Kylo and the woman stopped in front of the stairs leading down to the subway station. He waited until the perfect moment and it came seconds later when Kylo leaned down and kissed the woman. Hux snapped a picture and pocketed his phone with a vindictively gleeful smile. Snoke would be very interested to see what Kylo Ren had been up to lately.

*****

Monday morning rolled around and Rey woke up feeling a little lethargic. She’d slept so well on Saturday and then last night she’d spent half the night tossing in turning. Her mind had been working in circles: from elation at the turn in her relationship with Kylo to guilt over the infidelity to insecurity over what their relationship was now and then the cycle would start over again.

She’d had to turn off her phone and hide it in her dresser drawer in order to stop herself from texting him at two in the morning. She was inexperienced when it came to relationships and yet she knew enough to know not to make angsty late night texts. Nothing good would come of demanding to know the nature of their relationship in the middle of the night. Rey found that she liked Kylo too much to jeopardize what they had going by demanding more than he was willing to give.

Calling Rose or Finn was out of the question -- they wouldn’t approve of her involvement with Kylo Ren. He was older and married and more sexually experienced than she was. They would insist he was taking advantage of her and maybe he was. But Rey was young and had never experienced anything so was it so wrong to just enjoy what was happening? She didn’t want her friends making her feel bad about it.

So with Kylo and Rose and Finn securely off the list of people that she could talk to on the subject, Rey decided her next best bet was Kaydel. If nothing else, Kaydel wouldn’t make her feel bad about the sexual nature of her relationship with Kylo. When lunchtime rolled around, Rey found her feet leading her to Kaydel’s desk.

“Hey, Rey,” she greeted cheerfully. “How was your weekend?”

“Um, good. Really good,” Rey hid a smile.

  
Kaydel grinned, “You saw Kylo, I take it?”

Rey nodded. “I was wondering if you wanted to get lunch?”

“Of course.” Kaydel stood and grabbed her purse, slinging it over her shoulder. She stepped around the desk and looped her arms through Rey’s and started guiding her out of the office. She stopped to poke her head in Poe’s office, “We’re taking a long lunch.”

“Says who?” Poe asked, raising an eyebrow as he turned his attention from the computer.

“Says me,” Kaydel smirked.

Poe sighed and turned back to his computer. “I suppose you’re not asking permission?”

“You know me so well,” Kaydel said and blew him a kiss before tugging Rey away. For her part, Rey let Kaydel guide her and chat her ear off because this was a conversation that Rey wasn’t willing to start with co-workers within ear shot.

When they sat down at a little deli down the street, they quickly placed their orders and as soon as the waitress walked away, Kaydel turned to Rey, “What’s up? I can practically hear your brain overthinking.”

Rey found it hard to actually look Kaydel in the eye as she readied herself for the conversation, so she instead swiped a finger up and down her glass of ice water, collecting little droplets of condensation on her fingertips. “Um, promise you won’t judge me?”

“Rey,” Kaydel gave her the look. “We talk about daddy kink all the time. Do you think I’m going to judge you?”

“Maybe,” Rey shrugged. “I’m kind of judging me.”

“Why?”

Rey sighed and then just decided to come out with it. “Kylo is married.”

“Seriously? Wow, Rey…”

She frowned, not expecting to get judged so quickly and it was hard not to feel hurt by Kaydel’s tone. “I know it’s bad…”

“I mean, I just get such… virginal vibes from you…” Kaydel continued and Rey looked up to see her smirking and realized her friend wasn’t all that disappointed in her. “Is he in love with her?”

“I don’t know. He’s still married to her,” Rey shrugged and went back to playing with her glass of water.

“That doesn’t mean anything. He might have his own reasons for staying married or maybe he’s a chicken shit or an asshole. I don’t know him,” Kaydel shrugged. “But I know you and I’d like to think that you’re better than carrying on an affair with a dirt bag.”

“I just don’t know what to do,” Rey admitted. “It’s still new and I don’t know how to ask him about his wife without overstepping boundaries or coming off as jealous.”

“Are you jealous?” Kaydel asked.

“Obviously. But I don’t want him thinking I’m clingy or needy or something when we didn’t agree on an actual relationship,” Rey explained.

“Ah, I see,” Kaydel grinned. “You have feelings for him.”

Rey blushed, “I suppose…”

Kaydel rolled her eyes, “Well then we just have to make sure that he has feelings for you too. He obviously wants to feel like he’s in control so we just make sure that he’s not able to think about anything else but you and then he’ll be the one to bring up the relationship talk.”

Rey wondered if this was how Kaydel’s relationship with Poe worked. There was something humorous about Kaydel secretly being in charge of the relationship while letting Poe think he was. “How do I do that?” Rey asked in response to Kaydel’s advice.

Kaydel’s grin widened, “We send him a little treat, of course.”

*****  
  


Rey and Kaydel’s long lunch turned into taking the rest of the day off. When lunch was finished, Kaydel dragged down the street to a lingerie shop. “We’re going to send him pictures of you wearing…” Kaydel trailed off as she skimmed through several sets of lingerie before finally pulling out a see-through off the shoulder bra and panty set, “THIS.”

Rey blushed, “No way.”

“Oh, come on,” Kaydel smirked, “It’s going to drive him insane.”  
  
Rey hesitated. What if he didn’t like it? What if she’d misinterpreted everything? What if he got mad? What if his wife saw it?

Kaydel pulled out her wallet and paid for the set before Rey had a chance to voice all of the concerns drifting around in her head. “Come on,” Kaydel handed her the bag and grabbed her hand. “We’re going to your apartment and we’re doing this. No being shy.”

Rey gave in, deciding that if Kylo hated it, she simply would never see him again. She would know for sure how he felt and as much as it would hurt, she would do her best to accept it and move on. 

*****

On Monday afternoon, Kylo was called into Snoke’s office. As he shut the door behind him, he knew that something was wrong. First, he had received no reply to any of the emails he’d sent to Snoke that day -- only the one requesting his presence. Secondly, it was unusual to be called in for a meeting that was not on his schedule. And third, he was the only one present at the meeting besides the CEO.

He tried not to show how nervous he felt as he wondered if this was it -- had he finally disappointed Snoke enough that he was getting fired?

“Sit,” Snoke urged, eyeing Kylo with cold eyes as he crossed the room.

Kylo sat in the only other chair in front of Snoke’s desk. He swallowed as the old man narrowed his eyes and then turned his computer screen to face Kylo. “Care to explain, Ren?”

Kylo’s heart dropped into his stomach at the picture on the screen: Him kissing Rey outside of the train station yesterday. “I… How did…”

“Enough,” Snoke interrupted. “This is how you repay me for everything I’ve done for you?”

“It’s not what it looks like,” Kylo began.

“I don’t want to hear your excuses. It is what it looks like. You’re fucking some vapid cunt who barely looks old enough to vote,” Snoke spat.

Kylo wanted to argue. He hadn’t slept with Rey, but he knew that it would be a moot argument because he wanted to sleep with her. Hell, he planned on it. But now Snoke knew about her and he needed to kill that thought.

“Nothing to say?” Snoke growled. “I gave you my daughter. You have a wife at home and you don’t need to go looking for the first little slut who will open her legs for you. Pathetic!”

Kylo could feel his simmering anger boiling over into rage. How dare he call Rey a slut when she was the purest person he’d ever known? And as for Caroline, what was he supposed to do with a drunk wife who could barely take care of herself? Even if he wasn’t utterly repulsed by her, it was not as though she could consent to sex in her state. 

“I want you to break it off,” Snoke demanded.

Kylo knew that he had no choice. His feelings for Rey didn’t matter to Snoke. The last eight years of Kylo’s life had been dedicated to pleasing his boss. If he gave that up for Rey, he would have nothing left in the world -- no job, no family to return to. And what if Rey didn’t feel the same way he did? What then? He’d be losing everything for nothing.

Snoke was right: he needed to break things off with Rey. He needed to move forward and his infatuation with her wasn’t helping him. He thought he could learn how to be more nurturing, that he could mend past mistakes, that he could overcome all of the issues with Caroline and do what he needed to. He hadn’t planned to be so attracted to Rey. He hadn’t planned to find her so enchanting or for every little thing she did to be so endearing. Rey was Rey and he loved her for it, but he couldn’t give up everything on the hope that she felt the same way.

“Yes, I understand,” Kylo said as he stood up. “I’ll break it off.”

“Good,” Snoke said, narrowing his eyes. “Now get back to work.”

Kylo didn’t need to be told twice as he exited the office and headed back towards his own, wondering how on earth he was going to tell Rey that he could never see her again. Instead of thinking about it, he threw himself into his work with a fervour that he hadn’t felt in over a year.

At some point, from the corner of his eye, he saw the incoming text from Rey but refused to look at it and break his concentration. He needed to push her from his mind and do what he should have been doing all along instead of letting her occupy his thoughts these past couple of weeks.

He stayed until he was the last person in the office, even after Snoke went home, and only then did he pick up his phone and unlock it. As he pulled up his messages, he psyched himself up to just call her and explain the situation and break it to her as gently as possible because she deserved that much at least.

  
What he had not been expecting was a picture of Rey, sprawled out on her bed in a sheer bra and panty set. His cock grew hard immediately at the sight and he decided, as he pressed the call button that there was no way he could let her go.

*****

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is what I consider to be the beginning of Act II - we'll learn more about Kylo's past with Caroline and the repercussions of his relationship with Rey coming to light. (Also from this point on, most chapters will contain smut.)
> 
> There is a lot of discourse on Twitter today about darkfic and while this isn't really going to be typical darkfic, I once again ask that all of you take some time to read through my tags and make sure you're okay with everything you see there because darker topics are coming.


	7. Chapter 7

“I want to take you away,” was the first thing Kylo said to her when he called that night. “My beautiful girl.”

Rey blushed, and from the strain in his voice, she knew how tightly wound he must be after receiving the pictures she sent. She wondered what he thought of them, what he was _doing_ with them, but she was too shy to ask. “Okay,” she agreed softly instead.

His breathing quickened and Rey thought she knew what he was doing and it sent a thrill through her to know that she could reduce this stoic, disciplined man to jerking off to pictures of her in her underwear. 

The Rey of a month ago would have been disgusted at the thought of a man masturbating over her, but Kylo had awoken something in her and all she felt now was the thrill of knowing what he was doing -- that he was talking to her like everything was normal as he pleasured himself to the sound of her voice. Heat pooled in her belly and she wiggled out of her panties before slipping her fingers between her legs. “Where are you taking me?” she asked, but her voice came out breathy and wanton as she dipped her fingers into her wetness and dragged them back up to circle her clit.

There was a soft grunt on Kylo’s end before he promised, “Wherever you want to go, sweetheart.”

Rey’s eyes rolled back into her head at the endearment and she bit her lip as she rubbed her palm against her sopping cunt, remembering what it had felt like to have Kylo’s muscled thigh against her. “I just want to be with you,” she whispered.

“Fuck,” Kylo gritted out and Rey thought she could hear the sound of skin on skin as he pleasured himself -- a steady rhythmic sound. 

Rey’s hips jerked off the bed and she tried to time each rub of her clit with that sound, to imagine what it would be like to feel him there between her legs or even inside of her. The thought sent a breathy moan tumbling out of her mouth and somewhere in the back of her mind she wondered where this lustful woman had come from.

The sound stopped and Kylo’s voice was once again strained as he asked, “Sweetheart, are you touching yourself?”

Rey stopped what she was doing, blushing and wondering if she’d gotten it all wrong. Was she here masturbating like some kind of pervert while Kylo was just trying to talk to her about an innocent trip? She swallowed hard and it was so loud that Kylo must have heard it.

“It’s okay,” Kylo whispered. “Daddy wants you to feel good. You can touch that pretty little pussy for me.”

Rey shuddered and she rubbed her index finger gently back and forth over her clit. “Y-yes, daddy,” she managed to pant in response.

“Good girl. Are you nice and wet for me?” he asked and she could hear him resume what he’d been doing.

“Mmhmm,” Rey squeaked out, her finger dipping lower and she was so wet that it slipped inside so easily almost as if it was being suckled on.

“You’re such a good girl,” he told her, and there is something about his ability to speak with such authority even as he pleasured himself that made Rey shiver and cry out. “You sound so lovely,” he continued. “Are you going to let daddy touch you, my little Rey?”

She nodded even though he couldn’t see her and she curled her finger inside of her as her other hand rubbed tight and quick circles over her swollen clit. She had never felt so alive, so powerful and aroused.

“Answer me,” he grunted and Rey knew that he had to be close from the way his voice was growing unravelled.

“Yes, daddy,” she said again and the muscles in her legs grow tense and achy as her orgasm draws closer. She realized with a desperation how much she wanted his hands on her body and it made her want to laugh with joy to know that she wasn’t so strange and different, that she wasn’t adverse to touch but had simply been waiting for _his_ touch. She could admit to herself that she wanted his hands on her so much that it turned her into this shameless and desperate thing.

“Good girl,” he praised and Rey knew she wasn’t good at all. Good girls didn’t masturbate over the phone with older married men. But he thought she was good, he liked what she was doing and that was all that mattered. The praise did something to Rey, melted her insides and made stars burst behind her eyes as she squeezed them shut and cried out when her climax crested.

The phone dropped from where it was pressed against her ear and when her orgasm ended she picked it up again to the sound of Kylo’s labored breathing, as if he too was coming down, “You’re so good, Rey. My little sweetheart.”

She smiled softly, a blush staining her cheeks as she let his words soak in. What did someone say in response to such praise? “Thank you, daddy,” was the only thing that she could think of.

“You’re going to sleep so well after that, aren’t you?” He asked softly.

“Yes,” Rey agreed, feeling shier than she should after masturbating for him.

“Good. I’ll call you tomorrow, sweetheart,” Kylo murmured. “Sweet dreams.”

“Goodnight,” Rey returned and after hanging up, she rolled over onto her stomach and screamed into her pillow before sending Kaydel a thank you text.

*****

Over the next few days, Kylo called her every night and although there was no repeat performance of Monday’s phone sex, she was able to fall asleep with a satisfied smile on her face knowing that every night brought her one day closer to seeing him again.

The smiles weren’t just reserved for when she lay in bed, daydreaming about what they would do on their first weekend alone together. No, she was pretty sure that she was smiling ear to ear all week, every waking moment. She knew that she must look like an idiot, and that was confirmed on Friday afternoon as she and Han took a break from working on the Albatross.

“Who’s the guy?” he asked as he stabbed at the questionable Salisbury steak from her university’s cafeteria.

“What guy?”

Han rolled his eyes and switched to trying the mashed potatoes instead. “Please, you’ve been checking your phone every five minutes and smiling at it all week.”

Rey’s blush went from pink to dark red. Had she really been doing that? Grinning at her phone like a lovesick school girl? Yes, she probably had. “Uh, he’s just a friend.”

“Sure,” Han laughed. “He better be a good kid or I’ll have to kick his ass for distracting you so much.”

“Oh, uh. He’s older than me. Fancy corporate job, very responsible and all that. If anything, I’m probably the one distracting him.”

“Older guy, hmm?” Han chuckled. “Sometimes that’s even more dangerous. Just ask Leia.”

Rey grimaced, having completely forgotten about the ten year age gap between Han and Leia. She remembered thinking what a perfect couple they were and now, despite seeing how insane they drove each other, she knew that the age gap made no real difference. Clearly, they were still crazy about one another. “He’s taking me on a trip this weekend and there’s been a lot of planning involved,” she changed the subject.

“Where are you guys going?” Han asked, taking another bite of his mashed potatoes. For Rey, it felt almost like he was being protective of her.

“I have no idea. He’s surprising me,” Rey replied and it was hard for her not to smile -- No one had ever taken her on a trip before. Or given her a surprise for that matter.

“Just be careful ok, kid?” Han reminded her and Rey had to laugh. Kylo would never do anything to her. Trust was hard-earned as far as Rey was concerned but she knew that Kylo would never do anything to intentionally hurt her. When she told Han as much, he replied with, “I meant, use protection…”

Rey nearly choked on her glass of ice water and she spluttered and tried to keep her face from turning red at the implication of sex. She didn’t think that they were there yet, were they? Was Kylo assuming that it would happen this weekend?

She was spared from the thoughts as Han continued, “I don’t want to spoil your fun or seem like a lame old dad, but just… don’t get too caught up in things, ok? That’s how we ended up with Ben and in my old age I just think that maybe things would have been different if we’d waited a few years. If Leia had focused on her career first, if we’d both been ready to be parents…”

Rey nodded, but had no idea what to say. Han didn’t talk about Ben often and she didn’t bring him up but looking at him now, it was clear that he was a father who desperately missed his son. He understood the mistakes of his past, but didn’t know how to fix them. “I’ll be careful,” she promised and decided then and there that she really wasn’t ready to go all the way with Kylo. Hopefully he would understand and respect that.

Han gave her a crooked smirk in response and nodded his approval. “Good. Now that that’s settled, I wanted to talk to you about the first flight when we finish the Albatross…”

Rey laughed heartily and shook her head, “No. Leia will absolutely murder me if I let you fly a plane and I would like very much to have a job offer when I graduate.”

Han’s face fell, which only made Rey laugh harder and the rest of the meal was spent with Han trying to convince Rey to let him fly the Albatross.

*****

Kylo’s reasoning behind taking Rey out of town was purely selfish but he knew that she was excited as she’d told him she’d never been out of town before. He wondered, yet again, about her upbringing and decided that he would try to ask her more personal questions on the drive.

As he loaded a suitcase into the trunk, he’d packed clothes for both himself and Rey, he thought about how much his life had changed in just the few short weeks that he’d known her. It was strange to think about how he’d felt just a month before, scared and lonely and like he would never feel happiness again.

And then Rey came into his life and she was sweet and charming and just a few hours in her presence was enough to soothe his soul for days. She was a welcome distraction from Caroline and Snoke and everything that had happened to envelope his life in darkness over the past few years.

He thought to their agreement -- maybe she wouldn’t want him to know anything about her personal life. After all, they were only meant to help each other in whatever platonic capacity they could through their arrangement. 

They’d thrown the platonic part out the window. Rey had agreed to let him touch her and he was planning on taking advantage of that beautiful offer. What was crossing a few more lines? It was strange how fiercely he wanted to know everything about his little sweetheart. Surely, she felt the same way about him?

She’d given him her address and he didn’t have any problem finding the rundown little tenement where she lived with who knew how many other college students packed in like sardines. He would rent her a nicer place if she asked him to, but he didn’t even know what the boundaries were anymore and didn’t dare risk upsetting her by offering. 

As she bounded out of the building in a mint green gingham dress, a grin stretched across her face, he couldn’t help but smile in return -- especially when she stopped in front of him and grinned up at him. He wanted desperately to throw his arms around her but held back when someone leaned out a second story window and shouted, “Hey Rey. Who’s your boyfriend?”

“Sod off!” Rey shouted back, her nose scrunched up and Kylo laughed because it was the first time he’d ever seen her angry and she was too damn cute. When she turned back to him, the scowl was replaced by an apologetic grin and he opened the passenger door to let her in.

He climbed in and started the engine, barely pulling away from the curb before Rey excitedly asked, “Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise,” he scolded.

“Is it in New York? Is it a long drive?” she continued as she buckled in and got comfortable.

“Yes and yes,” he answered as he sped through the city streets. “Now quit asking questions.” He liked how excited Rey was for their weekend away, but he wasn’t going to tell her that it was a necessity because someone at his company was having him followed and knew about her.

“You’re no fun,” she pouted, but it was clear that it was all for show.

“How was your week?” Kylo asked, changing the subject and it was clear from the surprise on Rey’s face that she hadn’t been expecting him to ask personal questions.

There was only a brief hesitation before she answered, “It was good. My summer internship is going really well and my boss is cool. She’s letting me work on my senior project at the same time.”

“Aeronautical engineering, right?” Kylo asked and part of him wondered if her internship could possibly be at his family’s company.

Rey nodded, grinning at him, “You remembered.”

Of course, he remembered. He’d remember anything that came out of her pretty little mouth. “Did I tell you that my dad was a pilot?”

Rey’s face lit up. “That’s so cool!”

“He taught me to fly,” Kylo explained. “I have a Cessna Skyhawk where we’re going if you want to go for a ride.” It had been over a year since the last time he’d flown and at least that long since he’d thought about Han Solo. He kept his pilot license because once upon a time, it had brought him such joy, but now there was so much bitterness that Rey was the only thing in the universe that would make him sit in the pilot’s chair again.

“Really? Yes! I want to go! Please!”

Kylo laughed at her excitement and nodded his head. “Okay, I’ll take you out tomorrow.”

Rey’s grin was so bright that Kylo thought he might go blind and his heart squeezed in his chest to know that such a simple promise brought her such joy. “I can’t wait. So we’re going to your house?”

“My grandpa’s house,” Kylo corrected. He’d spent so many weeks of his childhood at the home in the Finger Lakes and had paid his Uncle Luke a ridiculous amount of money when he’d placed it on the market like it had meant nothing. 

The rest of the ride was spent getting to know each other: Kylo found out that Rey would eat literally anything (including offal), that she only listened to classic rock (which he thought was embarrassingly lame) and that she moved to New York to start out fresh after aging out of foster care (that last bit of information sat like a rock in the pit of Kylo’s stomach). And in turn, Rey found out that Kylo hadn’t eaten processed food in five years (what was wrong with him), that he actually found himself now watching cooking shows when she wasn’t around (cute) and that he hadn’t spoken to his parents in years (which Rey thought was a tragedy, but wasn’t ready to push the topic yet).

When he pulled into the driveway of a huge house sitting right on a lake, complete with a boathouse, a plane hangar, and a small vineyard, Rey’s jaw dropped open. “Holy shit.”

“Language,” Kylo scolded, but his smirk was amused. 

“Kylo, this is ridiculous,” she laughed and he didn’t have a chance to respond as she took off down the driveway and onto the dock.

“Where are you going?” he laughed, but the words fell flat when she lifted her dress overhead and jumped into the water ungracefully. Not that he cared when the sight of her in only her underthings was so enticing. He took long strides down the dock and when he made it to the end, she was doggy paddling and grinning up at him. “I packed you a bathing suit, you know,” he scolded before bending down to pick up her dress.

“Aren’t you coming in?” she asked, ignoring his comment and watching as he hung her dress over the railing of the dock.

“I have to unpack my trunks first and…”

“Just come in,” Rey interrupted and laughed when he looked around to make sure no one was watching their secluded little section of lakefront. 

“Such a naughty little thing,” Kylo mumbled as he undid his belt. “I should punish you for that.”

“You’ll have to catch me first,” Rey shot back and grinned as she doggy paddled away.

Kylo quickly threw off his shirt and pants and dove in after her. She had no chance when he’d grown up swimming in this lake and he easily caught her in his arms, wrapping his arms around her and pulled her back against his chest. “Gotcha,” he whispered in her ear and when Rey shivered, he knew it wasn’t because the water was cold.

He released her enough so that she could turn in his arms and he couldn’t help but think she was the most beautiful thing in the world with cheeks pink from exertion and drops of water clinging to her eyelashes. He was about to tell her so -- maybe even pull her in for a kiss when she launched herself up, placing her hands on top of his head and pushing him under the water.

When he surfaced, she was several feet away laughing maniacally. “Gotcha!” she shot back and Kylo grinned before chasing after her once more.

Over an hour later, when Rey grew tired of the chase, saying that her arms felt like rubber, Kylo suggested they find something to eat for dinner and he helped Rey out of the water, trying his hardest not to stare at the way her bra and panties were practically see-through as he handed her the dress.

His mouth was still dry as he grabbed the suitcase from the trunk and brought it inside, instructing her to find something dry to change into. The kitchen was fully stocked and Kylo was grateful that he had the forethought to ask the cleaning staff to grocery shop. He wanted to keep Rey here with him all night and the thought of going out to eat was unpleasant.

He found a bottle of wine and uncorked it, pouring a glass for himself and one for Rey, and then got to work cooking the package of gnocchi he’d found in the refrigerator. “Is this for me?” Rey asked, sidling up next to him. With her bare feet, he hadn’t noticed her approach but when he glanced over at her it was hard not to admire her in the almost sheer nightgown she’d put on.

Kylo nodded and watched as she took the glass, sipping at it as she watched him pour the jar of tomato sauce into a saucepan to heat up. There was a change in the dynamic, Kylo realized, and he hoped that it wouldn’t be off-putting to Rey. She was still his little sweetheart, he wanted to make that clear as he leaned over to kiss her forehead, but she was also a woman he found himself extremely attracted to and he wanted to make it clear that this was more to him than whatever arrangement they’d previously agreed upon.

“It’s good,” Rey said, finding the basil leaves that he had chopped and adding them to the sauce.

“It comes from the vineyard here. My grandma started it before my mom was even born,” he explained as he stirred.

“Can we go take a walk through it tomorrow?” Rey asked as she watched him arrange gnocchi on the plates before ladling sauce on top.

“Sure,” he agreed. “Whatever you want to do, sweetheart.” He gave her a soft smile, one that seemed to be reserved only for her, as he placed a piece of burrata cheese over each pile of potato dumplings. He picked up a plate and held it out to her.

Rey took the plate, along with her glass of wine, and stood on her tiptoes to give him a kiss before turning and walking towards the patio door. “I want to eat outside,” she told him with a wink and didn’t wait for him to follow after her as thought she knew he would.

If only she knew how far he was willing to follow her and he wondered if that thought would be as scary to her as it was to him.

After dinner, Kylo lit the fireplace (which Rey insisted upon despite the fact that it was still eighty degrees outside) while Rey found a puzzle tucked away in the hall closet. They finished up the first bottle of wine and opened a second one, but it seemed that with a belly full of wine and food was enough to put Rey to sleep and when she fell asleep on the corner of the puzzle she was working on, Kylo carried her to bed.

He wished they had more time, that he didn’t have to take her back to the city on Sunday. He wished he could forget about Caroline and his job and everything that had been sacrificed on the way. As he tucked the blankets up around Rey’s shoulders, his heart ached knowing that what they had here was only temporary. This weekend would end and so too, eventually, would this entire affair with Rey.

For now, though, he would treasure these precious moments with her and hope that he would understand just how much she meant to his burdened soul.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always forget how much I enjoy writing this story until I actually start writing it and this chapter especially was fun. It has a little bit of everything: Han, Rey and Kylo getting closer to figuring out that they have more in common than they think, Kylo being soft and sweet, Rey becoming more confident <3 These two are so cute when left to themselves. Its such a shame that so much is going to happen to ruin it for them XD


	8. Chapter 8

When Rey woke, feeling disoriented in the pitch blackness of the room, she stretched her arms out, searching for something that wasn’t there. It took several more moments for her eyes to adjust, despite the light peaking through the door from the hallway, and she remembered where she was -- at Kylo’s vacation home. She sat up, letting her blankets fall to her waist, and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. 

She didn’t know what time it was, only that it was either very early or very late. She hadn’t come to be on her own, she knew that much and the last thing she really remembered was the puzzle she’d been putting together with Kylo. He must have brought her to bed, but then, where was he?

She swings her legs over the bed and stands, shivering at how cool the hardwood floors are against her bare feet. She shuffles to the door and wraps her arms around herself for warmth as she peeks into the hallway. The house is unfamiliar to her and she has no idea where Kylo might be right now, so she quietly opens each door she passes and looks in until she finally finds in his own bed and she frowns.

This was their first weekend away together and he was sleeping by himself? Rey wondered yet again if she’d misconstrued their relationship and then she scolded herself for the constant back and forth. Yes, he was married, but he’d taken her away so that they could be alone. So that they could indulge in their attraction for one another.

With that thought in mind, she slipped into the room and tiptoed to the edge of the bed, peeling the sheets back and sliding underneath. Next to her, Kylo exhaled and under the sheet and his leg twitched, making Rey freeze. Not for the first time, she was unsure of what to do with herself -- she had never shared a bed with a man and it was an odd mixture of nervousness and excitement that made her inch closer to him. 

When she turned to look at him, there was enough light in the room that she could see his profile as he lay on his back. She smirked, biting her lip to contain her amusement, because of course he would sleep on his back -- unmoving and stiff. So controlled. The urge to touch him, to trace his nose and lips, overpowered her and the minute her fingertips made contact he jerked awake and once she knew that he was alert, she moved closer and whispered, “It’s just me.”

“Rey?” he turned onto his side and held open arms out to her. “Is everything okay?”

She scrambled quickly into them and leaned her forehead against his chest to mumble, “I want to sleep with you.” Underneath the sheets, their legs naturally tangled when he pulled her closer into his embrace. Rey had never been held like this before.

“Your heart is beating so fast,” he mumbled sleepily as his hands began to move up and down her back soothingly.

Was this what it felt like to be loved? Rey wondered. She wasn’t under any delusions that Kylo loved her, but she felt as though she was the most precious thing he owned when he held her so gently. Part of her was ashamed to be so excited by the physical contact -- surely, it wasn’t as big of a deal to Kylo -- but she was where she wanted to be. When no answer came, because she didn’t have the nerve to tell Kylo she’d never been held, he just kept soothing her until she fell asleep.

*****

When Rey woke up the next morning, her body felt tingly all over and it took until she blinked the sleep out of her eyes to understand why. She saw Kylo’s face first -- looking at her so softly -- and then she shivered as she realized what he was doing. One of his large hands was on her breast, his thumb stroking back and forth over her nipple through her nightgown. “Good morning,” he spoke quietly and then took her nipple between his thumb and forefinger and tugged ever so gently.

Words died on Rey’s lips before they ever formed and she had to steady herself by reaching out and bracing her hands on his biceps. His eyes were amused as he worked his thigh between her legs and swallowed. “What are you…?” she started, but then the meat of his thigh came into contact with her cunt and she let out a soft moan.

“Did you sleep well?” he asked, moving his attention to her other nipple. He looked down, licking his lips as the stiffened peaks strain against the sheer fabric of her nightgown. As if under a spell, he didn’t even wait until she answered before he leaned down and peppered her breasts in kisses and then wrapped his lips around one of the nubs and suckled at her like a babe.

Rey let go of his arms, threading one hand in his hair and using the other to muffle her moans as Kylo rolled her onto her back, settling on his knees between her thighs. “Rey, sweetheart,” he said when he lifted his head. “Can I see you? Can daddy see your sweet little tits?”

His expression was wild and his lips were wet and pink and Rey decided that she would like nothing more than to see them on her breasts. She didn’t know where this was coming from -- weeks ago she was terrified of being touched, of the thought of being naked in front of a man. But now she nodded and watched as Kylo eagerly pushed her nightgown up and sat up so that he could pull it off.

“Beautiful,” he breathed and his eyes were so full of wonder that Rey had to believe it. When she settled against the pillows once more, he took his time with her breasts -- running his thumbs along the soft skin on the underside, testing the weight against his palms, circling her nipples teasingly until they puckered and tightened. “Such pretty tits, sweetheart. Daddy thinks you’re so beautiful.”

Rey couldn’t speak -- she’d forgotten how when it seemed like Kylo was such an expert in playing with her body. He leaned down, kissing his way down the column of her throat and nibbling lightly at the flesh where her neck met her shoulder until she moaned and her legs fell open lewdly. She was aware they were getting carried away, but the more time she spent with Kylo, the less she cared. He was the only person who had ever made her feel this way and if he wanted all of her, she would gladly give it.

His tongue replaced his hands and as he began to kiss and lick and suck at her breasts, he grabbed a hand and laced their fingers together. The gesture was so sweet and so perfect it was almost enough to distract Rey from Kylo pressing his hips into hers. She gasped at the contact and it was the first time that she felt an erection.

Kylo lifted his head and his lips were glistening, but he pressed them to hers in a soft kiss and when it broke, he whispered, “Do you trust daddy?”

Rey nodded. She trusted Kylo more than she had ever trusted anyone, as misplaced as that trust in a married man was. “Yes.”

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, daddy,” she managed, but it was more of a moan of encouragement than anything.

“I’ll make you feel good, sweetheart,” he promised, pressing his hips into hers.

She shuddered against him as his hips began to move. His cock was big, she knew this even though she had nothing to compare it to, and as it began to slide against her, she wondered if it would even fit.

As if he could read her thoughts, he said gently, as he lowered his head to mouth at her neck, “It’ll fit. You can take it all like a good girl.” It was a promise of what was to come and she must have gone rigid underneath him because he lifted his head again and told her, “When you’re ready for me.”

Rey nodded and closed her eyes, focusing on the slide of his body against hers. She was wet -- she probably had been even as he’d played with her body in her sleep -- and her panties clung to her cunt. Every drag of his cock spread her fluid and finally Kylo announced, “You’re so wet, Rey. Does it feel good?”

“Yes,” Rey answered, and her eyes fell shut as she clung to his shoulder with her free hand.

He squeezed the hand that was still linked with his and instructed, “You feel so good. So perfect for daddy.”

Rey shivered and beneath him, as if her body was chasing the pleasure he was giving, her hips began to move, undulating against him. 

“Good girl,” He cooed. “Just like that.”

Rey groaned, tilting her hips up as his thrusts grew wilder, so that he would press and rub at her clit. He was heavy and the width of his body was making her hips ache, but it only heightened the pleasure he was giving her. They’d fallen into a rhythm, their hips moving frantically against one another as they sought release. 

He stopped moving and Rey groaned at the loss of friction but she lifted her hips from the bed, pressing herself against him and grinding against him the way she had against his thigh.

“Yes, baby, use my cock,” He grunted and the sounds coming out of his mouth grew more animalistic. 

There was a strange sense of power knowing that it was her body he was enjoying, that she was doing what he wanted and that it felt good for him. Pleasing him was even more exciting to her than what they were doing. He rolled over onto his back, pulling Rey along with him until she was straddling his hips.

“Keep going,” he commanded. “Show daddy how you make yourself feel good.”

Rey blushed and lowered her head, feeling too shy to look at him as she rubbed herself against him. She leaned forward on her knees, bracing herself against his chest as her hips started to move faster. 

Her panties were soaked and his the front of his sleeping pants were clinging to a cock in a filthy way that she knew was caused by her, but it also allowed her to feel the bulge of his balls against the seam of her ass and the pulsing vein that ran along the underside of his cock and best of all, that fat tip that she knew would split her open. That was her favorite part and when she leaned forward, it prodded at her clit in just the right way.

“God, Rey,” he groaned, gripping her hips as he started to push against her again. “You are so perfect. So sweet. Good girl,” he was babbling and she thought maybe that meant he was close to finishing.

The praise did something to her -- every time he told her she was pretty or good or made her feel special, it made something inside of her nurture and grow and she had to squeeze her eyes shut as she clenched her thighs tight around his hips. Her orgasm made her whole body shake and she heard Kylo grunt and felt him still and then he pulled her down onto his chest and stroked her back soothingly. 

She let her brain go blank, mostly because she was finding that easier than focusing on what they were doing. What  _ she _ was doing. With a married man. 

After a few minutes of cuddling Kylo said, “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since that night. The night I could smell what you’d done to yourself. Were you thinking about me, roo, Rey?”

She hid her face against his sweaty chest, deciding somewhere in the back of her mind that she liked the manly smell of his underarms and she nodded her head. “Yes.”

“Sweet girl,” Kylo responded and kissed the top of her head.

More time passed, without many words passed and Rey almost fell asleep again until Kylo asked, “Do you still want me to take you out in the plane?”

Rey perked up, forgetting all about her state of undress, and nodded down at Kylo. “Yes!”

His eyes fell to her chest and he licked his lips, reaching up to cup them in his hands. Mournfully he said, “You should go get dressed then.” His fingers flicked her nipples lightly and Rey’s hips jerked, making him laugh. “Although we could just do this all day.”

“But you promised,” Rey pouted and began untangling herself from him. 

Kylo laughed and let her climb off of him. She covered herself and reached for her nightgown on the pillow. “Okay. I’m going to shower and then I’ll meet you downstairs?”

Rey nodded and pulled on the nightgown, watching Kylo climb from the bed and go to his bathroom. Her suitcase was probably in the room that he’d put her to bed in, so she went back and decided that she would move her stuff in later. She didn’t have much time to spend with Kylo -- she got 48 hours on the weekend and then had to wait a whole five days to see him again. Sleeping was time wasted and once they got back to New York, she wouldn’t be able to share a bed with him anymore.

She peeled off her panties and nightgown and climbed into the shower, taking her time washing her hair and shaving her legs. When she stepped out, she towel dried her hair and threw it into a top knot before putting a dress on and hurrying downstairs.

It seemed that she beat Kylo so she went to the kitchen and began putting together a picnic lunch -- the refrigerator was full of sliced meats and cheeses and grapes and olives -- and then she found a bottle of wine in the pantry and when she returned to the kitchen, Kylo had a picnic blanket and smirked at her, “Great minds think alike?”

She smiled and let him carry their lunch out to the hanger where he loaded it into the light aircraft. Rey was bouncing with excitement as he opened the door to let her into the co-pilot seat. Her fingers were itching to touch the buttons, and though she knew the mechanics, she’d never flown a plane before so she sat on her hands to resist the urge.

Kylo opened the hanger doors and then climbed in, starting the engine and taxiing onto the small runway. “Ready?” he asked, and Rey nodded eagerly, buckling herself in and craning her next as the plane picked up speed.

She squealed as the plane lifted smoothly and then they were off, floating above the water. He took her on a tour of the Finger Lakes, pointing each one out and telling her about the towns. For the first time, she heard a little bit about his childhood -- that he’d spent his summers here with his uncle and occasional visits from his parents that lived in the city.

She knew that he was estranged from his parents, and that thought prickled something in the back of her mind, like she had forgotten something important. There was bad blood between Kylo and his family, she could taste it in her mouth, so she only listened as he told her what he was willing to and bit her tongue when a question bubbled up.

He seemed so happy flying and it made Rey’s heart skip a beat. He often gave her gentle tight-lipped smiles and his expression was almost always soft where she was concerned, but it was the first time she’d seen such joy on his face. Dimples and imperfect teeth and crow’s feet. He was beautiful like this.

When he took her back, he carried the picnic basket and Rey took the blanket and he walked her out to the vineyard. She teased him about his wealth as she set the blanket out and he fed her grapes and when they were done eating, she let him lay his head in her lap. “Tell me about your job.”

His eyes were closed, but his face wrinkled at the question. “It’s boring. I work in finance.”

“Why do you do it if it’s boring?” she asked, reaching down to rake her fingers through his hair. It really was the softest thing she’d ever felt.

“I got into it because I thought I would take over the family business, but it didn’t work out that way,” he explained cryptically.

She knew that she wasn’t getting the whole story but she also knew that she wasn’t entitled to it. Her desire to know everything about him didn’t matter more than his feelings. She wanted to talk to him, to know him better, but she had to approach it gently. “Did you ever think of becoming a pilot? You’re good at flying. And it made you really happy up there. I could tell,” Rey urged.

He shrugged, “My dad was never around because of his job. It was hard on my mom. And hard on me. I do like to fly, but I don’t need to be a professional pilot to do it.”

Rey frowned and Kylo opened his eyes to look up at her. “I’m sorry. About your parents.”

“Don’t be,” Kylo brushed her off. “At least I had parents.”

Rey shrugged, “I don’t think I had it harder than anyone else.”

“Hard enough that you had to look for it somewhere else,” he pointed out and Rey flushed because obviously he had deduced the root of her daddy issues. “No judgement. I had to go looking for it somewhere else too.”

Rey tilted her head, “What do you mean?”

“My boss. I did an internship the summer before my senior year too and met him. Snoke. He’s not exactly what many people would consider a good guy, but he was a good mentor. He took me under his wing and invited me into his family,” Kylo told her.

“So he’s like a father figure to you?” Rey asked softly.

Kylo closed his eyes again and turned his face away. “Yeah, you could say that. I ended up marrying his daughter.”

Rey’s fingers tightened in his hair and her stomach clenches. She suddenly didn’t want to hear anymore -- not about how he’d met his wife and found the family he’d never had. 

“I’m sorry,” he said, pulling her fingers from his hair and sitting up to look at her. “I shouldn’t have brought that up. I --”

“It’s fine,” Rey tells him. “I already know you’re married. And we’re just messing around here, right?”

He frowned at her, “Messing around?”

“Yeah,” Rey nodded and began packing up the picnic. She felt like crying. Or maybe screaming. “I don’t have any delusions that you’re going to leave your wife or that this is going to last.”

“Okay,” Kylo replied, and his voice is uneasy. “Then we’re just messing around?”

Rey nodded again and tried her hardest to keep her face neutral, despite the overwhelming urge to purse her lips.

“Okay,” he said again, and his voice didn’t sound as relieved as Rey expected it to be. She was letting him off the hook. He didn’t have to feel guilty about her feelings or worry that she would get too clingy. She was acknowledging the elephant in the room and he should be grateful. Instead, he took the picnic basket from her and left her to fold up the blanket as he began walking back towards the house.

*****

Kylo knew that he had no right to be angry -- Rey had set boundaries with him in the beginning and he’d already broken every last one. Clearly, she was trying to set new rules and he  _ should _ be relieved. He was well aware that their affair would have to come to an end -- most likely at the end of the summer when she would have to get back to her school work. And with Snoke breathing down his neck about the affair, well, he was risking a lot just this weekend.

But his chest ached and he didn’t want to think about what she’d said. For him, at least, it wasn’t just messing around. He wanted to believe that it wasn’t for her either -- she was sharing all of herself with him and he viewed that as a gift. So why was she rebuking him like this?

He was angry. Hurt and angry and confused. He had already put away their leftovers and cleaned out the picnic basket by the time Rey slinked back inside, looking sheepish.

She didn’t look at him as she set the folded blanket on the table. “Don’t be mad at me, Kylo. I want to enjoy the time I have with you.”

He didn’t turn to look at her and didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t really mad at  _ her _ . The words she’d spoken had hurt, yes, but they were true. No, he was angry at the situation. He didn’t want to be with Caroline, he didn’t love her. He wanted Rey and that was why he was angry. That was why he was hurt, not because of her truthful words, but because they both knew that it could never be more than just messing around.

Her arms wound around his waist and she clung to his back. He could feel her breath against his spine and knew that she was breathing him in. It made him shiver. 

But he couldn’t stop thinking about how things were drawing to a close for them and that hurt. He didn’t want this to be over when it was the happiest he’d been in years. Maybe it was the happiest he’d ever been. 

He was mostly silent for the rest of the night; as he made dinner, as they finished putting their puzzle together and as they went up to bed but Rey kept the lulls occupied with her nervous chattering.

“I’m going to take a bath,” she announced, as she hauled her suitcase into their now-shared room and rifled through it for a clean nightgown. He’d done such a good job folding and packing it all and now it wouldn’t even shut because of how she just crammed everything in. She was the only person he would forgive for such a grievance.

Kylo nodded and stood, opening the bathroom door and drawing a hot bath for her, with plenty of bubbles. When she finally entered the bathroom, she was completely naked and her flush went from her face, down her neck and to her breasts.

He couldn’t breath she was so pretty.

She ignored him as she climbed into the tub and sank below the bubbles and he sat down to brush his fingers through her hair and then braid it into a crown. There was something soothing in the silence and in the task of braiding and when he was done, he rested his arms along the edge and just watched her.

The silence stretched on and Kylo realized they were both thinking about the end, when it would come and he hoped, at least, that this wouldn’t be their last weekend together. “Come on,” he stood and grabbed a towel, holding it out for her to step into.

Rey climbed out of the bath, missing the bath mat and splashing water all over the tiled floor. She didn’t seem to notice her mess as she stepped into his arms and he wrapped her in the towel, taking his time drying her body. When he set aside the towel, she reached for her pajamas, but Kylo tugged her away. “You won’t need them.”

He led her into the bathroom and sat on the end of the bed, positioning her in front of him. “What are you doing?” she asked nervously, raising her arms in an attempt to cover herself.

“I need to take care of you,” he replied, and pulled her onto his lap.

Her body shook, not from fear or from cold, but from anticipation. “T-take care of me?”

“Mmmhmm. Lie down, sweetheart.” He commanded, pulling her back so that she was sprawled out on her back across his lap. “Daddy played with you today,” he spoke and then leaned down to lap at her nipple like a cat drinking milk. “Daddy fed you,” he blew against her nipple as his fingertips ghosted along her stomach. “Daddy gave you a bath.” His fingers trailed lower, dipping between her legs and her entire body jerked when he brushed against her clit. “I took good care you, didn’t I, sweetheart?”

She nodded, watching him through heavy lidded eyes.

“Daddy is going to take care of you here, too,” he told her and his fingers stroked through her folds, catching the wetness as it formed and dragging it up to her clit.

Rey moaned and covered her face with her hands as he started rubbing back and forth along her most sensitive spot. Her hips jerked up and her arms flailed above her head, hands clenching and unclenching as she tried to find something to hold onto.

Kylo was going all out -- one massive finger was rubbing tight, quick circles along her clit and the other hand was being used to draw those same tight circles at the tip of one of her nipples. Her body was on fire and the only function her brain seemed capable of was processing the sensations -- she tried to speak, to cry out and tell him it was too much, but the sounds she made were not words.

As his index finger worked her clit, his ring finger trailed lower, prodding at her opening and when he began to push it in, wiggling like it was a tight fit (which it was with his massive finger), her hips jerks and she cried out, “Oh my god…”

“Shhh,” he cooed. “Be a good girl, Rey.”

She swallowed and nodded, relaxing her body as the finger sank in and then he began to move it in and out of her and she actually sobbed. “K-kylo…”

“Does it feel good?” he asked and the hand playing with her breast moved down to her clit so that he could push his finger in deeper. And when she nodded, he rewarded her by curling the finger upwards, finding that spongy patch and Rey’s walls clenched around his finger as she orgasmed. He worked her through it, sliding the finger in and out until she pushed his hand out from between her legs.

Her cheeks were red and wet from tears she’d squeezed out in her orgasm and she panted up at him, “Too much.”

He brought his finger to his mouth and licked it clean, deciding then and there that he was going to taste her next time. “You could take more,” he told her as he helped her sit up. “I’ll teach you. Next weekend.” It was a promise. His way of telling her that this wasn’t over yet and that he didn’t  _ want  _ it to be.

Shyly, she kissed his chin and wrapped her arms around his neck. “It felt good.”

He smiled and lifted her in his arms, standing and walking around the bed. Pulling back the covers as she clung to him, he then set her down gently, like she was made of glass and tucked her in before stripping down to his underwear and joining her under the sheets.

She wiggled over close right away and made herself at home in his arms. “Goodnight.”

He wrapped his arms around her, letting the tips of his fingers wander over whatever naked flesh he could reach. He thought maybe she was asleep until she moved closer, pressing a kiss against his chest. “I want you to know something, Rey,” he declared. “I don’t love her. My wife.”

“I know,” Rey replied easily, and her voice sounded sleepy. “I wouldn’t let you touch me if you did.”

He relaxed as he pulled her closer, smushing her face against his chest. Her admission didn’t make things hurt less, didn’t make him feel less guilty about putting her through this, but at least she knew that his feelings for her, on whatever level, were genuine. And that maybe she hoped for something more just like he did.

*****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um, so Twitter has spoken that there is no such thing as too much smut. So... there's that. Enjoy!


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